‘The Good Place’ 3×09 Review: Woah, Janet.

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We’re trying a new thing this week, or at least, a new thing for this show. We’re doing quick thoughts! Basically, I watch the episode and just list what I’m thinking as I do. So HERE WE GO:

  1. Who is this creepy old man?
  2. Why is he getting up at 5AM?
  3. Why is there so MUCH LIGHT AT 5 AM?
  4. This upbeat song lies.
  5. Michael and Janet are so bad at cover personas, it’s almost funny ANYONE believes them.
  6. I mean, you don’t have to think they’re a demon and a life-like basically robot to think they’re weird.
  7. Doug, honey, I think you would have been better off if you hadn’t figure it all out.
  8. I ain’t even kidding.
  9. He’s not a celebrity, Michael. Stop treating him like one. He’s just a miserable old man who’s not actually living life because he’s already thinking about the afterlife.
  10. OMG, NO. THE WATER.
  11. NO.
  12. NO.
  13. NO.
  14. Where can I get Eleanor’s shirt?
  15. The whole thing about not naming the snail sounds kinda cute, TILL YOU ACTUALLY THINK ABOUT IT.
  16. THEN NOTHING WOULD HAVE A NAME.
  17. EVER.
  18. Who wants to play pool Jason-style with me?
  19. He. He.
  20. Tahani was a better friend in this life than she has ever been, color me surprised.
  21. Also, good advice. Eleanor DOES want more with Chidi. Otherwise, this would be for nothing.
  22. “It’s never a bad idea to tell someone how you feel.”
  23. I love dogs, but 71?!?!
  24. Raymond, you ARE THE WORST.
  25. The system sucks, btw. In case you hadn’t realized that now.
  26. Happiness pump.
  27. YES.
  28. Also, Janet, you know it all. I forgot. How could I forget?
  29. It’s still weird when people remember Chidi’s lessons. What can I say?
  30. Does calling someone by the wrong name really deduct points?
  31. What about spelling it wrong?
  32. Because if it does, I feel bad for just about EVERYONE WHO’S EVER SENT ME AN EMAIL.
  33. Scotch tape fixes a lot.
  34. But not death.
  35. DEMONS
  36. Doug makes me want to cry.
  37. CRY
  38. If this is what we have to do to get into The Good Place, then is it worth it? Do we have to be miserable to be good?
  39. I guess that’s the question.
  40. Psst, I think the answer is no.
  41. Ice cream.
  42. Chicken parm!
  43. Now I’m hungry.
  44. Who knew Janet could kick ass.
  45. I DIDN’T.
  46. Adrenaline makes us honest?
  47. Is Chidi going to short-circuit?
  48. He has a history of doing that.
  49. Well, not yet, it seems.
  50. Later, I’m sure.
  51. It’s super awesome that they don’t let Shawn finish his evil villain speech.
  52. YES, THE POINT SYSTEM SUCKS.
  53. WE BEEN KNEW.
  54. Of course there are accountants.
  55. Of course.
  56. Also, Jason, my baby. Evidence isn’t a good thing.
  57. HAHAHA.
  58. Also, the four of them staying with Doug.
  59. HAHAHA.
  60. I hope Doug comes back.
  61. HAHAHA.
  62. Oh, yay.
  63. They’re going into Janet’s void.
  64. But …like …what can they even do there?
  65. FUN, ANOTHER CLIFFHANGER.
  66. NOT.

The Good Place airs Thursdays at 8:30/7:30C on NBC.


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