Welcome home, Prince Lazarus.
Homecoming celebrations have begun as the people, the press, and the Royal Family themselves welcome Prince Robert home with open arms.
Eleanor is greeted bright and early by the fantastic smell of her favorite food. Bacon. Only the bacon came with a companion named Beck. Yes, you read that right; Beck is back. He is back to be Robert’s Equerry, which is a an officer of honor. Apparently Beck has suffered some sort of memory loss or confusion as to who Eleanor is and thinks that waltzing into her room with a plate of bacon means that everything can go back to normal. Eleanor sets him straight and tells him that she is happy with her boyfriend. She doesn’t need Beck or his bacon. Besides, that’s what the palace staff is for. If Beck would’ve just left Eleanor’s room unseen, thing’s would’ve been a lot easier, but Jasper saw him though the security cameras.
Tension continues to build between Liam and his older brother during this episode. Liam seems to be cutting off all ties to Kathryn in the beginning, but, of course, that quickly changes when she texts him wondering if they can talk. When Liam arrives at Kathryn’s house, their talk is cut very short because Kathryn gets a text from an unknown number. All that was in the text was a steak emoji. Kathryn explains to Liam that it is from Robert and it means that he wants to meet. Meat, meet. Get it?
Kathryn climbs onto the back of Robert’s motorbike and they’re off on a romantic adventure. Robert takes a walk down memory lane with Kathryn as they sit on a blanket under the tree where they first kissed. They talk about a funny paparazzi experience that ended with Robert saying, “Pricks for the prick.” Turns out Robert is a huge fan of poetic justice. He’s also very aware that he has no right asking Kathryn is seeing anyone with everything that’s happened, however, he does let her know that he misses her.
Back at the palace, Helena is doing everything she can to convince Cyrus to give the crown to Robert and make sure that everything goes smoothly on the balcony. Smoothly to Helena is code for Robert being front and center, by the way. Knowing Cyrus, he isn’t too quick to give up his power, no matter the fact that he told Helena he agreed with her. Cyrus questions Robert’s mental health and brings up that Robert is, in fact, legally dead. This newly rejuvenated Cyrus is not going down without a fight.
“Dearest Eleanor, why the hell was Robert coming out of your room?” That’s the first thing Jasper says to Eleanor this episode. Jasper is having some difficult trusting that Eleanor will realize Jasper isn’t enough for her and go running back to Beck. Eleanor assures her worried boyfriend by calling them Jaspenor (Yes, she actually said the word JASPENOR!).
Before Beck tries to ruin everything good between Eleanor and Jasper, he has a nice reunion with Beck. Remember, they were best friends. I wouldn’t mind getting more scenes between those two to see what they get up to. Smiley and friendly Beck becomes asshole Beck very quickly. All it took was an encounter with Jasper. Beck starts rattling off very unimportant things like birthright and how many tassels he has. Jasper is not impressed but he’s definitely bothered.
There are some really small, nice moments between Helena and Eleanor this episode. Having Robert home and him wanting to see them get along has worked wonders for these two women. Helena has a dress that she really wants Eleanor to wear because Helena wore it on the balcony after Eleanor was born. Obviously Eleanor is completely disgusted by the out-of-date dress. By the end of the episode she has fixed up and put a smile on her mother’s face by wearing it on the balcony.
There’s also a really small, hilarious scene between Jasper and Liam. Jasper is talking about how he’s worried about Beck, Eleanor’s ex, and Liam is talking about how he’s worried about Kathryn’s ex, Robert. Now Jasper has zero idea that Robert is the ex, and when Liam tells Jasper, he has the most perfect reaction. The only way I can fully express its greatness is by providing a gif:
Kathryn is off stressing about which brother to pick or whether she should just let them both go. Her sister, Angie, thinks she should just “go for both.” Liam ends up meeting with Kathryn soon after and promises to tell Robert that day about them.
Eleanor confronts Beck after finding out all of the awful things he said to Jasper. She puts him in his place by saying, “Class isn’t about who you are, Beck. It’s about how you act.” Beck comes and apologizes towards the end of the episode and accepts Eleanor’s peace pipe. The peace pipe thing didn’t really make sense to me, because the last time we saw Beck he was doing everything in his power to get Eleanor to stop drinking and doing drugs. Anyway, they share a friendly hug, and I assumed that everything was going to be okay. Never assume anything when watching The Royals.
Robert walks in on his mother in full mama bear mode, ready to take down Cyrus for questioning her son’s legitimacy and mental health after everything he’s been through. Robert assures her that “all will be well.” He is later deemed the Cyrus Whisperer after convincing his uncle that it was his idea to have a privy council determine who will take the throne. The scene between Robert and Cyrus is really telling about their relationship in the past. Even though Robert was saying all of those things to get on Cyrus’ good side, it was still fun to see Robert call Cyrus nicknames like Scar and chap as he brought up old memories, like how Cyrus was the person who gave Robert his first and second drink of liquor. I personally liked that Robert would always go to Cyrus when Simon was too hard on him. It let us see a softer side of Cyrus that is usually kept behind a locked door. I mean, Robert is really great with his words. He even compliments Cyrus’ fight against cancer and shows condolences for his fight with Helena. So, all in all, Robert gave Cyrus the prime spot on the balcony to get the throne.
Our dear Liam is feeling like the giant shadow of his brother is swallowing him hole. His mother coming into his room and telling him to always stay a step behind Robert isn’t helping much. Helena gives a brilliant and interesting speech about why the people crave hierarchy and the personification of the ideal family. She tells Liam how all of that affects people, how it makes them feel safer and more at peace. Then, Robert tells Liam that he will be taking over Liam’s charity work over yet another game of darts. Liam seems to be losing the game of darts on purpose.
Jasper has a little run-in with his conscious in the form of all of the people in his life popping up on the security cameras telling him all of the worst things possible about himself and his relationship with Eleanor. Even Sara Alice was included to nag him about his butterfly-looking eyebrows. Jasper then meets Eleanor in the tunnels where they discuss trust, which is very important to these two characters for obvious reasons. He just can’t get stop thinking about how Eleanor is too good for him. Eleanor tells him to only listen to her when it comes to their relationship, not anyone else. Especially Beck. Eleanor takes him to the throne where they have sex for inspiration for the letter Jasper has to write her.
What do you think is the best thing to do before going out on a balcony in front of millions of people in person and on television? Well, Liam thinks drinking is the best thing to do. Hate to say this, but I don’t think he can drink these problems away. With a little alcohol in his system, Liam becomes more irritable then normal and pounces on Beck after he makes another rude and sassy comment to Jasper. Robert pulls everyone back together and the family heads to the balcony. Robert slyly steals the first official wave away from Cyrus. Robert also hugs his brother to show the people that they are united.
Though, I do not know how long that brotherly love is going to last. Liam was losing that darts game on purpose. That’s his place, to always be second to his brother. But for how much longer?
Some bits and bobs from this week’s episode of The Royals:
- Robert has proven to be very poetic in this episode.
- The meat or steak emoji doesn’t exist. Trust me, I checked.
- I accidentally let it slip my mind but the pub that Kathryn’s dad owns is called “The Prince’s Arm.”
- There was talk off adding a phoenix to the family’s crest, and I would really love to see that.
- Tom Odell’s song “Sparrow” was the final song featured in the episode. I think that was a great choice.