If you are talking about people who are doing Twitter right, the first person that springs to my mind is Ryan Reynolds. He’s got this persona that tells people off in the funniest and kindest way. His humor is just so dry – it can be interpreted in a lot of different ways – but it always makes us LOL. His sarcasm makes us want to up our sarcasm game.
That time he pitched the perfect drug.
They should consider inventing drugs that make you feel better about everyone else too.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) January 6, 2016
That time he talked about making a statement with your car.
The pen is mightier than the sword. Also, parking a car in someone’s living room sends a pretty damn clear message too.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) March 6, 2016
That time he talked about the perfect getaway vehicle.
Crime sprees would be so much funnier if your get-a-way vehicle was Hodor from Game of Thrones.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) August 7, 2016
That time he reminded us we should teach kids to cover their mouths early in life.
My daughter just sneezed into my yawning mouth. Seemed really fucking pleased with herself. Joke’s on her. She’ll have to bury me someday.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) April 16, 2016
That time he reminded us when it has a color on the cover it does not a coloring book make.
My infant daughter’s traumatized for life. 50 Shades of Grey = Worst fucking coloring book ever.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) July 17, 2016
That time he called out someone for stealing his tweet.
.@Refinery29 – You changed only three words. And two of them, were my name. At least buy me dinner first. pic.twitter.com/7GkxGgfxP1
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) July 29, 2016
That time he called out the complexity of a dick pick.
If people are gross enough to send dick pics, at least have the courage to use a face-swapping app.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) July 6, 2016
That time he summarized this election year in one tweet.
Tough call. Continue watching election coverage – or tickle fight with a starving adult lion.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) August 10, 2016
That time he called out why a good sexy time playlist is needed.
It’s difficult… but not impossible to make love while singing MMMbop.
I’m sorry for this tweet.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) August 22, 2016
That time he reminded us traveling with kids isn’t always the best.
What’s better than a 12 hour drive with a screaming 1 year old? Not including hepatitis.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) June 2, 2016
That time he reminded us we may not know what all the apps on our phones are for.
Tinder isn’t a babysitting app. Apologies to Crystal and Janine for the misunderstanding.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) August 19, 2016
That time he reminded us changing a diaper can be deadly.
After this morning’s diaper, my daughter finally earned the teardrop tattoo on her face.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) June 14, 2016
That time he reminded us shitty remarks may be coming.
When somebody starts a sentence, “with all due respect…” it’s almost guaranteed they’re about to say something shitty.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) May 6, 2016
That time he reminded us to take care of ourselves first.
Tip: It’s important parents take little “time outs” for themselves too. Even if you feel pretty guilty when you return 14 years later.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) May 3, 2016
That time he reminded us that sometimes all caps are important.
I’m writing a children’s book in “all caps” so people know to yell.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) May 13, 2016
That time he reminded us you aren’t alone with your anxiety.
If pure anxiety was an Olympic sport, I’d feel really fucking anxious about all the gold medals I just won like a BOSS.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) August 17, 2016
That time he reminded us that fleek should not be a word.
My brother used the word, “fleek” in a sentence, and I had trouble listening to the rest of our relationship.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) May 5, 2016
That time he reminded us we should all look good for Zayn.
Zayn isn’t on the Graham Norton show with me anymore. I’ll still go… But obviously I got my lips done for nothing. #DeadpoolDoesLondon
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) January 27, 2016
That time he came up with the most genius app ever.
They should make a Tinder for really delicious sandwiches–because holy fuck-tank what’s happened to me?
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) June 11, 2016
That time he spoke of the responsibilities of being a father.
Being a father means responsibility. Not just for your main family, but also the secret one in Denmark nobody knows about.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) June 19, 2016
That time he reminded us that getting married isn’t easy.
Someone should bottle the unspeakable emotional terrorism between Brides and Maids of Honor. Then pour it on our enemies.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) August 28, 2016
That time he reminded us that Google needs to up their translation game.
Google Translator sucks! So embarrassing. I just asked a sweet elderly man in Taiwan which bus runs to his asshole. I meant MY asshole.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) January 20, 2016
That time he made us crave a bloomin onion.
Just got home from an Outback Steakhouse and I swear to God, I thought I was in Australia.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) January 16, 2016
That time he embraced the achy-breaky heart.
Just want to wish Billy Ray Cyrus the most special, magical birthday ever. I love you with all my heart. Also, Happy Birthday to my wife.
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) August 25, 2016
That time he reminded us a nap is important.
Thanks for all the great questions. That was super tiring! #AskRyan pic.twitter.com/k4LThVTICf
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) February 5, 2016