The Irrational Season 2 Episode 12, ‘Straight From the Heart,’ was emotionally intense and scientifically incredible. Alec and the team focus on a case where one character believes she may have killed someone in her sleep. Turns out she recently had a heart transplant and is having a hard time sleeping because the donor’s heart has memories of how its host died.
A donor heart, having memory. Morbid. But kind of interesting.
While the team tries to figure out how the victim died and who killed them, Marisa also deals with a personal situation. Earlier this season, we learned that Marisa gave up a baby for adoption when she was 17. In ‘this episode’Straight From the Heart,’ we know she has put her information on an adoption site in case her son wants to meet her. Turns out he does, and despite the emotional rockiness, the two manage to talk.
Fangirlish spoke with Maahra Hill about her character’s journey thus far and the recent dive into her backstory in The Irrational Season 2 Episode 12, ‘Straight From the Heart.’ Read more below!
Fangirlish: Walk us through the process of preparing for this backstory and the fruition that’s come from that?
Maahra Hill: Well, the backstory was introduced to me before we shot the episode in the forest, where she recalls all the memories. The showrunner, Arika, called me up and generously offered this rich backstory. As soon as that was presented, I started to dive into a world where a child would be given up for adoption—the abandonment that comes with that and the difficulty of the decision for Marissa. You go into your imagination and play around with the depths of the relationship and what it means.
I worked with a couple of different coaches, John Markland and Diana Charles, who helped me get deeper into the emotional piece and the relationship side. I was just grateful to explore something that hopefully speaks to people—whether it’s foster care or adoption. It’s something that means a lot to me. I’ve actually done some volunteer work as a CASA, and I hope this story can be of service to the audience in some way. It was very meaningful and impactful.
I immersed myself in the relationship, considering what it was like when she was pregnant, what she was going through at the time, and her connection to the child. All the intricate details—the trauma she experienced—would have impacted her pregnancy and her relationship with her son. But I don’t think she’s ever forgotten him. My thought was that not a day goes by when he doesn’t cross her mind. When she passes someone about his age on the street, she probably wonders if that could be him.
Of course, it was an honour to portray that story and to live in it.
Fangirlish: Especially as a mom, how do you balance that? I know from experience—we have a lot of newer moms in our family—and they jump right into mom mode. There’s no segue, no transition period. How did it feel to step back and be more hesitant, knowing your character has been through so much pain and can’t just do the same?
Maahra Hill: I don’t know if I’d say I was fighting natural instincts. I think what was so impactful for her was the immediate recognition—on a heartfelt level. The entire episode was about what the heart feels, about cellular memory within the heart and tissues that are in your body. I think people often ignore what their bodies hold. Emotions live in the body, and that’s why people say to deal with them, express them, get them out—because they can lead to disease or illness if left unaddressed.
I think that experience, that relationship with him, was literally living within her body. Her body was communicating, This is familiar. This is someone we’ve nurtured and loved for a period of time, no matter how long ago. So I think those instincts naturally came up. But because her lived experience was so different from what her body had known with the baby, it became a reason to take off and run—just not being ready to face it.
There was a noticeable difference between how I approach motherhood and how she does. It was completely different. I’m like, You can’t spell smother without mother. I do the absolute most. I could probably learn something from her—like, back off a little. But the opportunity to explore a character who made a different choice was fascinating. As an actor, you always have to understand the choice. I didn’t see it as something different from choices I’d make, because the sacrifice she made was for the child. Moms always make sacrifices for their kids.
I didn’t see it as a sacrifice she made for herself to have a better life. I saw it as a sacrifice so he could have a better life. The trauma she was experiencing at the time just wouldn’t have provided a nurturing environment for him. So you know, it’s always interesting and fun to play something opposite from your own life, but I do feel like the decision was similar—at its heart. It was a similar level of sacrifice from a mom to a child.
Fangirlish: How will this storyline play out through the rest of the season? Are we going to see her and her son talk more? Will we see her confront the trauma and pain this brings up from her past?
Maahra Hill: Yeah, what can I say? The relationship is new. At this stage, she’s very hopeful that they can build something moving forward. I have to say—tune in to find out! But there’s great hope that a door has been opened. Like you said, he’s done very well. The family chosen for him was a great one. It’s always tricky—what do you say about the episodes ahead?
It’s a relationship wrapped in hope. There’s hope to overcome some of the trauma they’ve both been through. You can’t ignore what it must feel like for him—to have been let go by his biological mom. Some things will come up that explore those rough spots. But even with that, there’s still so much hope around this open door and the possibilities for their relationship.
Fangirlish: One final fun question—outside of this storyline and her career, what do you hope to see for your character? And in your wildest dreams, is there anyone you’d love to work with?
Maahra Hill: You know, at this stage, after everything she’s been through in the first season and now into the second, I’d hope she develops a deeper relationship with herself—one that allows her to dream bigger. She’s made choices that have kept her in the same place, and others that have made her more free.
There are so many people I’d love to work with! My wildest dreams for her wouldn’t be too different from my own—the idea that the world is your oyster, that you feel limitless in everything you do, and that each moment brings more freedom to become a better version of yourself. I think she does that as best she can, especially in her relationship with Alec.
She wants him to be happy, maybe even stuffing her own feelings down a bit around how she feels about his new relationship and letting everyone else be happy first. I would love to see her find happiness for herself. Come forward a bit more. To see her dream of the biggest possible future for herself and her career—something different from her past experiences. Maybe a new relationship could be fun. Who would that be with? I’d have to think about that.
So many options! But really, I just want to see her dream bigger, feel freer, and give herself more permission to live her best life.
The Irrational airs Tuesdays at 9/10c on NBC.
