Heated Rivalry Episode 5 “I’ll Believe in Anything” sees a cosmic shift happening with Shane and Ilya as individuals and a couple. So much of their relationship has been built on their own expectations of what they have and who they think they are. And Episode 5 sees them laid bare, making it one of the most intimate episodes that I’ve seen in my TV-watching career.
A lot of times, when people talk about intimacy, they automatically go for the physical aspects of it. And Shane and Ilya have had sex, multiple times, over the years. But I don’t think that they have had true intimacy, a feeling of being close and seeing each other for who they are, until Episode 5. Because for me, intimacy is being close to someone on an emotional level to the point that they see your scars, your pains, and your dream,s and they sit with every version of you. That’s intimacy.
Episode 5 gave me that kind of intimacy in multiple moments.
MORE: Have you read our Heated Rivalry Episode 5 review?
A notable moment for me was when Shane came out to Ilya. It wasn’t easy, got a little messy, and they didn’t understand each other at first. But it became kind of a linchpin moment where they ended up closer than ever before, and it wasn’t sexual. Or at least it wasn’t in the beginning. Shane told his truth about being gay, and when the despair of not having that possible future with Shane hit Ilya in combination with his father being so sick, Shane didn’t crawl into his lap to initiate sex. He crawled into his lap to hold him close, so the only thing that Ilya would see would be Shane, pressed chest to chest and hiding him from all the pain that he was experiencing in that moment. He was giving Ilya focus and grace.
I would say that even the scene after, where Ilya is laying across the bed, they clearly shared in a sexual nature, that was a new form of intimacy for them. And Heated Rivalry as a show presented that by giving us the aftermath of a supposed sex scene and making the important part how they linger on each other, the gentle looks on their faces, or even the hesitancy in Shane’s body to walk ou,t and for Ilya to let him. It feels raw, and like they’re seeing each other for the first time. They don’t need sex to define their relationship anymore. In that hotel room in Florida, they defined it.
MORE: Heated Rivalry proves Queer stories sell. And more are coming.
Then there’s the phone call after the death of Ilya’s father.
Even though Shane and Ilya are in a space now where they see each other for who they truly are, there are pains that Shane doesn’t totally understand. If they do this, if they really commit to each other, Ilya can’t go home again. And instead of trying to fix this for Ilya, Shane listens. That right there is Shane accepting Ilya for who he is and not who he imagines him to be. And Ilya telling Shane everything, from his fears to his love, is him understanding that Shane is a space where he can breathe. There’s liberation in that closeness. And it might not be the thing that brings them together like the Scott and Kip of it all at the end of the episode. But it’s a moment that speaks to a shift in who they allow themselves to be around each other.
I also want to talk about the bed scene.
Shane and Ilya feel so comfortable around each other, even though they’re not out, that being like this in bed doesn’t throw them into a panic. It’s a new norm for their life. They have a mutual understanding that they can share these quiet moments after sex. No longer do they have to run away or pretend that they don’t love this comfort or the tiny world they create at each other’s side. They do. So they lay in bed, and they joke around with each other. Because they’re on the same page and because they understand that they want this. They just don’t know how to have this and be in the sun.
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Altogether Episode 5 of Heated Rivalry understands that intimacy is more than just a gratuitous sex scene. It’s the small moments. It’s Shane accepting that Ilya is going to worry about him when he gets injured on the rink. And it’s Ilya paying attention to the fact that Shane loves his ginger ale and being provided for in small ways, like tuna melts. But it’s also appreciating each other’s company in a bar in Florida or by the pool. It’s casual affection where Shane wishes he knew Russian to connect better with Ilya, but still listens. And it’s both Shane and Ilya allowing themselves to make the decision to come to each other at the end of Episode 5 when they see Scott and Kip kiss without fear of the world knowing.
“I’ll Believe in Anything” is how I want shows to tackle intimacy when it comes to romance. Because yeah, sex is hot, and Heated Rivalry proved that you can film it in a way that feels intimate and not salacious, something to be discussed in another post. But that is just a sliver of what intimacy is. And if shows want to build a well-rounded romance that satisfies all kinds of viewers while also reflecting the emotional intimacy we experience or desire, they need to lean into the kind of intimacy that we saw masterfully displayed in Heated Rivalry Episode 5. That kind of intimacy moves mountains and changes lives. And Shane and Ilya have found it.
Queerly Not Straight posts Saturdays on Fangirlish with opinion pieces, listicals, reviews, and more focused on the LGBT community. Posts are ONLY published on Fangirlish.
