Grief might be the second most relatable emotion in the world, with love being the first. At some point, everyone in the world feels them, even if we don’t all process it the same way. We don’t all love the same way either. All That We Love is a film about both these emotions, and about the way they – grief in particular – impact our lives, and what it means to try to move on from it.
It is also a film about the importance of letting yourself feel things, even when others might not understand the depth of those feelings. Grief is such a particularly personal thing, and yes, there is real true grief to be felt in the loss of a family pet.
There have been many movies and many tears shed about the loss of pets in the past few years, but most of them have focused on the journey. All That We Love focuses on the after and seems to give permission, through Emma, for us to grieve a family pet just like we would a family member. And though there is, in some ways, a desire to make a caveat, there are also no caveats. Not really. Pets are family. For some, they are the only family.
All That We Love isn’t just about Emma’s loss, of course, though her loss colors other people’s losses, and her perception of her loss colors her perceptions of how other people deal with theirs. That is the thing about grief, it is, in many ways, selfish. It doesn’t understand other ways. Emma’s daughter Maggie is leaving. Her ex-husband, Andy is back. Her best friend, Stan, is also going through loss, and dealing with it the best way he can. But all of that is, in many ways, secondary to Emma. Her loss is all she sees.
It’s all she can focus on.
Lest you think, well, but she only lost her dog, sit and consider that grief isn’t actually rational. But All That We Love manages, somehow, to be both gentle and cathartic while also showcasing the selfishness and absentminded nature of grief. Because, in so many ways, we have all been there. We’ve grieved big losses and little ones, and we continue to do so every day. And though, sometimes, it is easier to put the next step forward and then the other one, the truth is that, well …what else can we do?
That’s life. And though there is some comfort in knowing that, in the end, whatever happens, the sun will come out the next day. It has to.
All That We Love premiered at the Tribeca Film Festival.