He gets out of the car.
After ten episodes of a boy who would rather do ninety down a back road than say one true sentence out loud, Cole Walter reads a text message at a starting line, looks up with something clear in his eyes for the first time since a driveway in episode seven, and gets out of the car.
I’ve waited long enough.
And then the show takes that — the single most hopeful moment of the entire season — and it puts a car through him. And it puts Elliott’s mouth on Jackie.
Netflix. Not cool.
Let’s do this. All of it.
Good for you, Dylan
We open in trouble, because Dylan called Mac and told him about the street racing.Cole is furious. And honestly? Good for you, Dylan. That’s called being a good friend, even when Cole doesn’t deserve it
I also still don’t like Dylan.
Here’s what’s actually happening – Cole is taking unnecessary risks because he’d rather do that than face what he did to Jackie, and that’s messed up. Mac is telling him he has a future, that he needs to pay attention, that this isn’t a game — and Cole is nodding at a man who is trying to save his life while chasing the only feeling that drowns out the other feelings.
That’s what the racing is. It’s a rush loud enough to cover the sound of what he’s done.
I understand that it is hard to admit you were wrong. That it is hard to admit you felt something you shouldn’t have, or listened to people you never should have let in your head. But when your mistakes land on other people, “it’s hard” stops being a defense.
So: good on you, Dylan. First of several times tonight. You still failed the night but also good on you.
The horse
There’s a new horse being delivered to the Walter place, and he is stunning — this gorgeous white animal — except he’s got a wound gone bad, an infection, and white and red everywhere, and he will absolutely let you know how he feels about being treated.
Katherine is worried. If they can’t get to it, they might have to put him down.
And Alex says what we all knew he would – we’re not putting him down.
Katherine asks him if he wants to help her with the animal. Alex agrees and I actually am excited for him about this. Alex has spent an entire season being handed things he didn’t ask for and failing at things he did. And here is a frightened creature in pain who won’t let anyone near him, and Alex looks at it and recognizes something.
Katherine is many things. She isn’t discrete, but she takes in the mustang because of Alex. I love that for him. That’s the whole architecture of that woman: her kid needed her.
The speakeasy party
The teen annex is opening soon, and they’re doing a speakeasy theme.
I am feral about this. That hidden room upstairs — Rosalind room, the one Jackie stood in and told a hundred-year-old ghost it was okay to stop waiting — is now the reason this whole town is going to put on a party. She took a sealed door full of somebody else’s grief and turned it into a place where kids can dance.
That’s Jackie Howard’s entire personality in one design choice.
Elliott is at the annex, being the driest human being in Colorado, and he apologizes to Jackie for disappearing after her parents died.
And she says it’s okay — she wouldn’t have known what to say either. Which, fine, is genuinely gracious of her, and it’s also true. Grief makes cowards of teenagers. Grief makes cowards of
He says he’ll miss this when he goes. She says he’s still coming to the opening, right? He helped build it.
He did. I’ll give him that. I hate it here, but I’ll give him that.
Then: are you asking me to be your date?
And she says — no. She’s not really ready for anything like that.
Correct. Completely fair. Jackie is not ready to be anybody’s date and she won’t be for a long while, because she and Cole are still in love with each other and she can’t move on from a thing she doesn’t understand. You cannot get over a breakup when you never got the real reason.
She’s not grieving a boy, she’s grieving a mystery.
She says she’s down to help with whatever it takes. He says he’s really enjoyed spending time with her.
Great. Good for you, sir. Now go away.
Then there’s a bang.
Six weeks, one week
Upstairs, where they’ve been retrofitting, a pipe has burst. They should have fixed those pipes. Here we are.
Water is coming through the ceiling everywhere — electrical, drywall, the works. The contractor says six weeks.
She has one week until the opening.
Elliott is freaking out on her behalf. She’s freaking out for real. And I have a feeling this works out, but I also have a feeling it’s going to be very hard for her to hear who made it work out.
Dylan does the hardest thing a friend can do
Dylan and Cole are at a street race and Dylan asks if he’s running the one they talked about.
And then Dylan does it. The hardest thing a person can do for someone they love.
He tells Cole this is junior year all over again. The same choices, the same mistakes, the same spiral — except this time it isn’t booze and girls, it’s this, and it’s not okay. It is not okay and you have to stop.
And then, you’re not done with Myrtle.
The car. He named the car. Of course he named the car.
And then the kill shot, delivered gently: I’m kicking you out. You have to go home. The ranch is your home. You can’t avoid Jackie forever.
Did Kiley tell you to say that?
Kind of. But she’s not wrong.
It’s heartbreaking, all of it, because Dylan knows he has to be the bigger person here and being the bigger person costs something. He’s the friend who took him in, and now he’s the friend throwing him out for his own good, and both of those are love.
Coming home
Jackie gets back to the Walter house with Elliott and tells everyone about the pipe. Danny asks about the opening.
It’s not going to happen.
And at that exact moment the door opens and it’s Cole.
You’re home.
Yeah.
And you see Jackie let out a breath — not relief. Dread. The specific dread of a girl who has been managing her heartbreak from a safe distance and just watched the distance evaporate.
Cole is making insane choices and he does need to get his life straight, but avoiding Jackie is not the thing that fixes it. Telling her the truth is the thing that fixes it. Avoiding her is just heartbreak with extra steps.
“I’m fine,” aggressively
Cole’s in the garage working on the car and Danny wanders in.
Danny is the person closest to Cole. He knows his twin. He know this is breaking him but how does he get him to open up?
Are you done with that stupid street racing?
Nope. Dylan took the car, so I’m going to see what I can do with this one.
You have got to be kidding me. Danny is fighting for his brother at every turn, but Cole is fighting against anyone fighting for him. Cole gets defensive fast: I’ve heard it from Mac, I’ve heard it from Tony, I’ve heard it from Dylan, I don’t need to hear it from you.
Danny — my beloved, the emotional-labor MVP of this entire season — doesn’t argue. He just says: Jackie’s doing a lot better now. How are you?
I’m fine.
And he says it so aggressively that I actually sat back. Wow Cole. That’s your brother.
Cole is not fine. Cole is not going to be fine until he admits what happened. That word is doing the same work in his mouth that it did in Jackie’s two episodes ago, and it’s going to break the same way.
Nathan and the band
Nathan got the spot in the European travel band. He’s thrilled — and then immediately he isn’t, because he doesn’t know if now is the right time to go. Not with everything that’s happened with his dad. What if something goes wrong and he’s on another continent?
Alex Walter is the voice of reason. He reminds him that he has to live. Alex says no. Mom and Dad will want you to go. This is your time. You need to go.
Then Alex flops onto his bed, and Nathan reads him instantly.
Okay. What’s wrong with you?
I kissed Kiley.
I was wondering when you’d realize you were in love with her.
You just want them to see it. These Walter Boys have issues seeing whatis in front of them. You want somebody in that house to grab both of them by the shoulders. But it doesn’t feel like they’re going to get there on their own, and Kiley is ignoring him, and that’s fair.
Grace needs this too
Jackie is at work drafting an email and she looks sick about it. When Grace sits next to her, Jackie has to tell her about cancelling the party. She has to explain — there’s just too much repair, there’s no way.
And Grace says okay, fine, and then: I invited Nico. And then, smaller: my parents filed for divorce. I need this.
And she looks at Jackie with these pleading eyes.
And Jackie — who has been “fine” for three episodes — finally says it out loud to a sixteen-year-old in a hallway:
Cole and I broke up and it’s killing me because I don’t know what I did. I don’t know what happened.
I guess I kind of need something too.
The real point of this is that people are grieving everywhere, but it’s how we deal with grief that matters. Grief isn’t a straight line. It’s not the same for everyone.
What are we going to do? Well, they will find a way to solve everything. They have to.
That’s the episode’s real thesis, right there. Two girls whose houses fell down deciding to build a party anyway, because sometimes the only available response to grief is a room where people can dance.
“It was an accident”
Alex chases Kiley down. Are we still doing the computer project?
Yes.
He’s been trying to call her, but the thing is she doesn’t want to answer for specific reasons. She’s waited a long time for him to see her as more than a bestie. But he ruined that with the words that he said.
Stop saying things don’t matter when they do.
And Alex says: yeah, but it was an accident. It doesn’t matter. It shouldn’t have happened.
Alex. Sir. STFU.
I understand he thinks he’s letting her off the hook. I understand he’s trying to meet her where she is. But for her it wasn’t an accident. That was the thing she has wanted her entire life. She has loved that boy forever. So you standing there calling it a mistake sounds to her exactly like I don’t want you.
It’s not kind. It’s just cowardice wearing kindness as a coat. Only the coat is ugly.
What is wrong with these Walter boys and their inability to tell the truth. Open your mouth. Enunciate. Say the words. It is not that hard.
DANNY AND THE NEWS
Danny is excited that he got into Carnegie Melon and instantly goes to tell Erin. She’s supportive and encouraging.
He’s afraid, but she tells him it’s going to be okay. She tells him that this has been his dream.
And he says: my dream changed. My dream is being here with you.
Oh, that is going to hurt.
Because she isn’t going to let him stay. She loves him too much to be the reason he didn’t go — what happens the day he regrets it, or worse, resents her for it? She’d rather put in all the work a long-distance thing takes than become the ceiling on his life.
Erin is a seventeen-year-old with better instincts than every adult in this town.
“I needed this party”
Jackie brings the city council rep to the annex to show her the damage, and the woman lays it out – the only way to get the annex open is to cancel the party and put that money into the repairs.
And Jackie says no. Absolutely not.
And she’s right. She’s so right. The kids need this. Silver Falls needs this.
These kids need this party. They need to see the whole town in that room. They need to know somebody is taking care of them, that there’s a place to go that isn’t a house where two parents are filing paperwork. A building with no opening is just a building.
I think these kids have been through a lot (not just the Walters) and a lot of them just need somewhere to breathe.
The bucket
Jackie’s at home doing her chores and she drops a bucket of water, and Cole comes out.
Are you okay?
Believe it or not, this is not about you.
Ma’am. Which — fair. It genuinely isn’t. It’s about her.
And he offers to find somewhere else to stay, and she breaks a little:
I just needed something to go right for once. I needed to know it was taken care of. I know it was a party. But I needed this party.
And Cole has to stand there and hear it.
He keeps having to see the way he hurt her. Knowing it is one thing. Watching her come apart over a burst pipe because that party was the one load-bearing thing left — that’s another.
I think in that moment he is begging the universe to let him un-hear it. I think he’s wishing he’d been enough. The tragedy is that he was. He just believed two men who told him he wasn’t.
The horse lets him close
Alex gets the horse to calm down. Lets him get close. It is so sweet and so quiet and I love it for him more than I can say.
He needed that. As much as he didn’t want to need anything, he needed one living thing to decide he was safe. It’s been too much for that boy for too long, and a frightened animal choosing him is exactly the healing he’d never have asked for out loud.
Cole goes to Richard
Cole goes into town to find Uncle Richard.
Uncle Richard. The man who told him he’s the reason his niece’s life is falling apart. Cole Walter walked into that office on purpose and asked that man for help.
Do you understand what that costs him?
He tells Richard about the annex, about the pipe, about what it means to Jackie. He’s trying to do something nice for her, and Richard is the one with the money and the reach, so Richard is who he goes to. It takes courage.
And I hate Richard. What he did was wrong on every level, full stop. But this is something he deserves to know, if only because his niece is drowning over it.
He’ll eat his words one day. That’s just a fact of life at this point.
What he actually needs to do is tell that girl what he said and why he’s responsible for her heart being in pieces. It is completely unfair of him to keep pretending it doesn’t matter. The pain she’s walking around with — that matters. I don’t get him. I genuinely don’t.
The whole town shows up
Jackie is depressed and spiraling over the party not happening, which — understandable. She’s eating pizza with Elliott and he’s trying to cheer her up, but he’s part of the reason that she’s in this position.
And Grace comes and gets her. You need to come with me. I need to show you something.
And she takes her to the annex.
And the whole town is there.
Everybody. Pitching in. Tools out, sleeves up, fixing the place.
And Jackie is blown away — that all these people showed up for her, for this, for the kids who need it.
And she has no idea that Cole did it. That he swallowed his pride and went to the man who gutted him and made sure she got her party.
I think it’s the sweetest thing in the whole season. He keeps reminding us, in ways she’ll never see, that he loves her. And he keeps reminding us that Richard should have stayed out of his niece’s business. Yes, I said it. No, I don’t care.
The annex gets fixed. She gets ready for her party.
And that poor girl has been through so much, and the one person doing all of this for her is the one person who won’t say a word about it — because being thanked would mean being seen, and being seen would mean telling her why he left.
The party
Elliott shows up to take Jackie to the party and I would like to smack his entire face.
And Cole is standing there confused about why this is happening — sir. You did this. You handed her to him with your own two hands.
I feel bad for him. Genuinely. Because I don’t think he understands what he’s done.
Alex comes over to talk to his brother. Exercise his understanding. Cole doesn’t want to talk about it. I don’t care that he doesn’t want to talk about it. He needs to talk about it, because the way he’s been operating is not okay.
And Alex is the one who finally asks: why did you push her away?
That’s not an easy question. It might be the hardest one anyone could put to him.
And he says: I’m just not good for her.
Which is not fair and not true and so much more complicated than either of those. I think that Cole owes Jackie and himself the truth.
But Cole tries to deflect.
Sir, I don’t think Alex has ever been a hero either — and then Alex proves he’s trying to be, because he admits he kissed Kiley.
About time. If we’re being honest, it is about time. Those two have spent so long circling the fact that they’re in love with each other, and the not-saying is causing catastrophic damage on all sides. Just say it. Both of you.
And Alex tells Cole the truth he needs. He encourages him to either admit you’re in love with Jackie and do something about it, or she’s going to find somebody else.
And Cole would rather eat his own toenails than let that happen.
But he also doesn’t want to blow up her relationship with her uncle, because Richard is the last blood family she has, and Cole knows what it is to lose people. Except what he doesn’t get is that Jackie falling in love is her right of passage. Hers to have, hers to survive, hers to decide about. It was never Richard’s to manage or Elliott’s to litigate.
And Elliott is moving in on her, in real time, in the room. So do something Cole Walter.
Inside the speakeasy
The party is gorgeous. Everybody’s having a good time. Jackie is happy. She’s focused. She would not be nearly this happy if she knew Elliott was a slime ball, but here we are. Elliott and Richard are lying to her.
I cannot get over Kiley watching Alex from across the room, so nervous she doesn’t know what to do with her hands.
Alex compliments Jackie and tries to stand up for his brother. One of the best things that has happened this season is Cole and Alex finding a way to be friends.
He tells her Cole was the one who put it all together. That he offered to pay the contractors himself. He went to Richard.
Why would he do that?
Because he still cares about you.
She won’t take it. She doesn’t think it’s that complicated. But it is that complicated, and she’d know that if she’d listen — and she’s not going to listen, because she’s hurt, and hurt people don’t listen. Hurt people hurt people.
And I don’t think she’s out of line. Not even a little. She has no reason to believe in him right now. He gave her none.
And as Alex tries to explain more, she cuts him off — and then Elliott appears to announce they’re out of sparkling cider.
I was hoping Alex would punch him. I’ll do it myself if I have to.
The race
Cole shows up at the track and Mac clocks him. He didn’t think he’d come.
Cole lies and says, “No, you’re right. This is where I need to be.“
Danvers has been trying to win this thing for years and never has. Honestly? Don’t care. Good for him. Whatever.
Cole wins his first race. He’s happy. Next up is Danvers, who he could absolutely beat, because Danvers is a jackass.
And at the party, Jackie sends him a text. Thank you.
He goes over to talk to his parents instead, needing his mind off things — and Katherine and George tell their son that stopping by the party would mean a lot to Jackie. That he matters to her.
I love this so much. Because they’re doing what nobody else has: telling him the truth about his own worth instead of assigning him a role. They are telling him how he’s important and he needs to hear that.
And he still hasn’t told them what Richard said. I want him to. I want Katherine Walter to hear that sentence and go put her fist through that man’s throat. I have wanted it for four episodes.
Meanwhile Jackie is spiraling at her own party: why would he do this? He breaks my heart in the worst possible way and then does some grand gesture — what is this? Is he sorry?
Grace gives bad advice and tells Jackie that she can’t worry about what Cole Walter does.
Yeah, actually, she can. Grace, one hundred percent she can. That’s what happens when you love somebody.
I get that Jackie wants to just be okay. But at what point does she realize this isn’t the Cole Walter she knows? She knows him. Something happened. Have a little faith that something happened.
He gets out of the car
Cole is at the starting line looking over at Danvers, and the look on his face is pure exhaustion. He doesn’t want to be here. He wants Jackie to be okay. He wants to talk to Jackie. He wants to be there.
And then he looks at his phone.
And everything changes. There’s something in his eyes — he’s not racing. He’s not waiting anymore. He doesn’t want to wait anymore.
He gets out of the car. Walks to the sidelines. Finds his parents.
I need to see Jackie. I’m not racing. I need to see Jackie.
Can’t it wait until after the final?
No. I’ve waited long enough.
About time, Cole Walter. About time. You have been standing there letting everybody else decide the shape of your life since a man cornered you in a driveway. At what point do you stop?
He stopped tonight. He got out of the car.
Everybody, mind your business
Dylan comes to Alex and tells him to give Kiley space. Don’t talk to her.
Dylan, mind your business too. What is wrong with these people? Nobody in Silver Falls can stay in their own lane, and every single one of these disasters could be solved by opening your mouth and saying the thing.
And Alex says yeah, no problem, I’ll give her space — no, Alex. That’s not fair. Kiley is the one who has to say she wants space. It’s not Dylan’s to hand over on her behalf.
And then
Alex finds Kiley to talk to her.
I made a mistake.
You said that.
No. The mistake was telling you it was a mistake.
What?
Congratulations, Alex Walter. You found your courage.
And of course — of course — Dylan comes down the stairs at that exact second. I’m not okay with that. Kiley, what are you doing?
WAIT WHAT
Danvers comes for Cole. You cost me the race. You cost me money. You owe me.
Which — fair, in the sense that Cole pulled out. Not fair, in the sense that that happens. And Danvers needed that money.
And out on the road, Danvers runs Cole off it. Literally runs him off the road. The car flips.
That man deserves to have his throat punched in. I have never been so angry.
And at the exact same moment —
Elliott kisses Jackie.
No. Absolutely not.
I do not like being left here.
Cole Walter spent ten episodes believing he wasn’t good enough for her, punished himself for it in every way available, fixed her entire world in secret without taking a single ounce of credit, and then finally — finally — chose her out loud, in front of his parents, in front of a crowd, with the engine still running.
And the show flipped his car.
And put Elliott’s mouth on her.
Netflix. Not cool. Not cool at all.
Silver Falls, you gorgeous devastating place. I’ll be right here, wrecked on the floor, until you tell me he’s okay.
Thank God that season four is in production now.
