I have started this review over about 20 times, not knowing what to say. So bear with me as I word vomit because this is something very personal to me. The subject matter surrounding the latest FBI: International episode, Fire Starter, was a sexual assault case.
I normally don’t even touch anything that has to do with sexual assault. It’s too personal and it leaves me anxious, nauseated, and quite frankly, angry.
Television shows, quite often, get the feelings, the emotions, the trauma of sexual assault wrong. I know that it is different for everyone and so before you judge that statement, just know that it’s not a debate for me. What it is, well, it’s my reality and what I have learned.
Turning on my computer to watch the screener, my knees bounced. My heart raced. I thought I was going to die. But I dove in, refusing to thing because thinking would make me turn it off and well, I knew that I wanted to be able to reclaim something in my life. And I am glad I did.
The team is called to the Czech Republic, as an American has been arrested after reporting her rape. She has been accused of assaulting the police (she didn’t). She reacted after they basically accused her of making up her rape and actually wanting to have sex. The two men didn’t believe her and by their laws their was no sign of her being raped.
At this point, I had to press pause and take a break. I had to breathe, because I felt physically ill. One of the things that is the worst thing in the world about being assaulted and the reasons that you don’t want to report it – is because people do not believe you. Instead they choose to judge you and think that it’s just regret. Seeing this play out on my screen made me want to vomit. I was PISSED.
But I made it through. I turned it back on and I watched the team arrive to help out Ally. I also watched their Czech host/counterpart/whatever she is, not believe Ally and basically call her a liar. I have NEVER wanted to slap a character into the middle of next week like I did at this moment. Who the hell does she think she is? Women not supporting women should be a crime and it was disgusting.
But you know who is the first person to rise to the occasion. Vo. When I am wrong, I will say it and quite frankly, with the way that Vo is rising to every occasion, and showing her strength, I forget that Kellet is no longer there. But back to this episode.
Vo never questions Ally in a way that makes her feel unsafe or as if she isn’t believed. Instead she’s comforting, a constant and a listener. She asks questions softly, and makes sure that she’s not showing anything that could upset Ally. But you bet your a** that she’s definitely showing that she’s a woman that believes and supports women.
Vo takes Ally for her rape examine. She adapts the way that Ally needs.
She’s the advocate I wish that I would have had for myself when I had to face the worst moments of my life. Vo is the type of agent that is going to make sure that the people around her know that she is fighting for them.
wWhen I was assaulted, I was told a million times that things like that don’t happen to girls like me. My mind literally broke when I went through everything, and I don’t know if I will ever be able to place those pieces of what died in me back together. But watching the way that Vo is fighting for Ally, I started to cry and I just whispered, “How different my life would be if I would have had an advocate like her.”
Ally isn’t handling her assault the way that the police want her to. She takes it to a new level when she posts the police officers online and calls them out for the way she’s being treated. So of course they put her back in jail, ready to move forward with the assault charges that she was was originally charged with.
Forrester and Vo are right back there to fight for Ally. Vo is heated, and honestly one of the best scenes happens. The female officer is straight up vile, and well, Vo is ready to slap her teeth out. Forrester stops her and his authoritarian I am the boss comes out.
I screamed at the computer, calling him names and really just hating him at that moment. Now, we all know that I love Forrester and most of the time he can do no wrong. But here, he was out of line. It felt like her was diminishing Vo for standing up for someone who needed it. I know that isn’t what he was doing, but logic goes out the window when you’re angry. I don”t know about any of you, but I was angry.
Even more than being mad at Forrester though, I was so angry over the way that Ally was being treated and that this woman didn’t believe her. There is a special place in hell for women that don’t support other women.
As the case progresses, the team is able to find clues that lead them to a suspect. A suspect that based by his pattern had raped 18 women across Europe. He was a pathological liar, and one that thought that he could get away with anything.
When Vo goes undercover so that the team can bust him, I truly felt for her. I was scared that something would happen to her. I stopped the show for a second and took a walk around the block. I had to think for a second about what it was that was affecting me so deep about this episode.
It felt like it was a lot and yes, it’s partially for the fact that it was about sexual assault. But even more than that it was me thinking about how I know all of these women in my life who have never reported their assault out of fear or retaliation. They’ve wonder if it was their fault. They’ve felt ashamed and for them, dealing with the shame that they shouldn’t have was already too much.
So questions or shame from the people they’re supposed be able to trust to help them – no thank you. I think that we all have to stop and take a look at our judgements about other people. We don’t know what they are going through. We don’t understand all that has happened.
But what got to me about this episode was that The Fly Team – all of them – were not going to stop until they got justice for Ally. And yes, I know that it’s a television show. However, it just made me think about how many peoples lives would be changed by someone fighting for them, believing in them, and making sure that they get their justice.
It’s a weird feeling to know that something is fake, but it’s also so relevant because it makes me stop and think. The way that Raines, Smitty, Forrester, and Vo were in this episode was a reminder that there are good people out there. Yes, they are written characters, but the way that they were brought to life by Luke Kleintank, Carter Redwood, Eva-Jane Willis, and Vinessa Vidotto was something great.
It was great because they reminded me that there are people that will fight for people. When Forrester and Redwood take out the suspect in the club – chasing him through until they made sure they had him. Applauded and apologized for screaming.
The way that they are able to tie him to the places that all of the assaults occurred, applauded. But for me, the most powerful scene was the end. The most powerful scene was when Vo went and took Ally to the one thing that she had come to Prague for. She made sure Ally knew that she could still live her life and that she would get through this.
When you watch an episode of television that moves you and that makes you feel, you need to say it. This was the hardest thing that I watched in a long time. But I am thankful I did. I am thankful that Luke Kleintank, Carter Redwood, and Eva-Jane Willis gave everything to their characters, and it came across in every second that they genuinely cared to tell a story, but have care with it.
But my biggest thing – Vinessa Vidotto, you brought Vo to life with the care and passion that I would hope that anyone would when they are playing an advocate. You were kind, caring and considerate. You were filled with heart. But you made Vo make it a safe space, which even radiated off the screen to make me feel safe enough to watch it. Like I said earlier, Vo’s the kind of advocate and agent that I would have wanted in my life – my life would have been so different. She’s the person I would have wanted fighting for me.
And that is truly a high compliment.
FBI: International airs Tuesdays on CBS.