‘Criminal Minds: Evolution’ 17×06 Review: “Message in a Bottle”

By the end of Criminal Minds: Evolution 17×06, we’re able to gain some key insight into where Gold Star began. (We find our North Star, if you will.) While we’ll definitely need to carry that with us throughout the rest of the season, Rossi and Gideon’s ill-fated draft…isn’t really the point. Not for us, at least. Instead, “Message in a Bottle” is really more about how we get to that knowledge and how we manage to bring everyone back together by the end of the hour. More specifically, what’s going to stick with us is this emotional, sometimes funny, story about what happens when someone cares enough to just be there for you when you’re at your lowest. It happens in two very different ways, but that’s it. That’s the message. So, let’s take a look at those two key pairings — and a ton of other stuff, obviously.

“It gives me you.”

Criminal Minds: Evolution 17×06 gives us the gift of adorable, hilarious, High!Jemily, but it also kinda sneak attacks us with feelings. It goes without saying that Paget Brewster and A.J. Cook are comedic gems throughout “Message in a Bottle,” but we’re saying it anyway. They give us so much, actually, that it’s almost impossible to have a clue what our favorite moment is — or even where to begin with listing several of them. Is it Brewster playing up the light sensitivity, slurring her way through quite a number of lines, or hollering about electrolytes and “Idiot City”? Hm. Or. Maybe it’s her utterly deranged grin when Emily starts to ask JJ “hey, did you ever…” and then realizes, she…doesn’t know what she was going to ask.

(Fill in your most garbage fire fangirl ending to that question here!)

Wait, wait. Perhaps it’s the whole chopsticks and salt & vinegar chips thing. But even that has many layers of fun — from Emily being shocked JJ doesn’t eat her chips that way…to JJ, eventually, picking up the trend and even…however you want to explain what Cook does with them as she watches, mesmerized, later on. Speaking of Cook: What’s our favorite funny moment for JJ? The way she is clearly amused AF with Emily, yet trying to hold back, right from the start? Oh! Wait. The particularly on point delivery of “…Emily?” and the slow way she sits down as the edible kicks in. No. JJ sprawled across the couch. That’s totally it, right?

Why not all of the above? The writing here is seriously a fangirl’s dream, from putting Jemily in this situation, to a number of lines. And to keep driving the point home: We’re praising both how purely silly some of the dialogue is and the more serious stuff. Especially some of the more serious stuff, really. When you combine that with our CM ladies (if you will) just selling it, let’s just say…it’s a good thing Criminal Minds: Evolution 17×06 drops on the 4th of July in the United States — because we finally have a reason to celebrate the day this year. Fireworks for Jemily? I think so. We’re certainly not partying it up over the state of our so-called freedom, out here.

And now, something more serious:

“So now, I’m struggling to to try to figure out why I’m fighting so hard to win this battle. Good vs. evil. So, if i’m gonna go out, I want it to be on my terms.”

Of course, the whole reason JJ comes to see Emily in the middle of the day is because she’s worried about her. And she should be — so are we. It’s worth pointing out that, in every single scene they do, Brewster plays Emily at her most suddenly-lucid when she’s talking about quitting. Because she’s really, truly considering giving up, and even the best buzz in the world can’t make that go away. As a viewer, it’s difficult to watch. Most likely, the only reason it’s even possible to hear her say some of the things she says without having a breakdown is because there’s so much comic relief, both preparing us for the places where Emily is completely sad and lost, and there to pick us up right after.

Case in point: The way her voice breaks on “so hard” in the line we quoted above is, frankly, unfair and rude. But immediately after it, she’s all “I need something sweet; I overdosed on salt.” (Relatable.) Oh, and that’s also when the walls start closing in on JJ. So, yeah…

It’s another situation where we’re not quite sure what the strongest part is. Except here, unfortunately, the “best” bits make us feel the absolute worst. But certainly, if we go back to our original point about this episode and what it means to have someone there for you, Jemily is the prime example. Every single time Emily talks about leaving, JJ is right there to lift her up and say, essentially, “no, ma’am.” She’s barely functioning when Emily gets the notification that she’s been reinstated as Unit Chief, but she still manages to get enough control over herself to (loosely) throw up those horns and be all, “hell, yeah. Let’s go.” And she snaps out of it enough to push back on Emily trying to send her resignation via text, tells her she has to justify it first.

“Think about everyone who’s come and gone since we met. Gideon. Morgan. Hotch. It’s like the longer you stay in this job, the odds are you’re gonna lose yourself. Or someone you love…or your…sense of honor. It just takes, and takes, and takes. What’s one thing this job has given you?”

Emily’s question about what the job has given JJ leads to a conversation about the BAUGATE site. To be perfectly honest, the conversation is long overdue; and if anything about the Jemily content in Criminal Minds: Evolution 17×06 falls short for us, it’s this. And even then, it barely does. Because, sure. JJ gets to say what she needs to say, and Emily gets to explain herself. Great! But it’s just…the conversation immediately goes right back to Emily‘s current crisis. Basically, it just would’ve been nice to have balanced out the time a tiny bit more so Emily could’ve been there for her in the same way. No need to dwell or anything like that. Just…a bit more. That’s all! And maybe that’s unfair to ask, given the state Emily is in here? But, seriously, the whole situation is unfair AF. So. Yeah.

“You know what bugs me the most? Is you — you…didn’t tell me! Did you — did you think I couldn’t handle it?”

At this point, JJ is basically a puddle. So, for her to gain enough control to sit up, find her focus enough to tell Emily she needs to be honest with her, and then have to hear Emily’s weak “I want to quit,” it’s just kinda unfair. A little bit gutting, even. No wonder she collapses back down after that. Pretty much same, JJ. Same. (Side note: Cook’s delivery on “with me” is…a lot. Like, we’re talking “gal pal” coworkers and not actual people in love here? Ok then!)

“We’re still here, Emily. We are…stronger. Than anyone — anyone — gives us credit for.”

But everything works out in the end — just for a throwback, let’s just say the CM ladies save themselves. JJ reminds Emily of the most important thing of all: “We don’t quit.” Talk about getting punched in the feels by this one, especially with the way JJ brings up both Paris and her miscarriage. All those other former agents left. Paget and AJ were kicked out years ago, only to come back because fans demanded it. Emily was kicked out. And JJ is her person, the one who has never given up on her and never will. Not now, when she’s down in the dumps and doubting why she does this job. Nope. Not back then, during those awful, awful times. And not ever, no matter what life throws at them.

The way Cook barely holds back those tears as JJ admits Emily was right about how much the job takes but then delivers the “it gives me you” line is so utterly pitch perfect for the moment. Same goes for Brewster’s reaction, which we’re still out here struggling to describe as anything other than “pure, stunned awe.” Next, add the completely selfless way JJ says she’ll still support Emily if she decides to quit her job — even if they don’t quit on each other and never have. Even if the only thing the job gives back to her is Emily.

…and what we have here is just the clearest picture of what it means to really, truly care for someone. To really, truly want to be there for them — to give them everything they need to make what you hope is the right decision. But to also know you can’t choose for them. And your place is by their side, through thick and thin, no matter what.

“I’ll support you. I will. Always.”

(No but if y’all aren’t lighting yourselves on fire after this…how? What even are coherent words to describe it?)

In the end, Emily chooses to go back to work. Because of course she does. All she needed was a reminder that, just like the job gives JJ Emily, it also gives Emily JJ. And for all the loss we, as viewers, have experienced over the course of this series — we still have them. Imagine, for a moment, if losing these two massive talents and what their relationship means to both us and this series had stuck, all those years ago. There would be no Criminal Minds: Evolution to speak of. We would’ve never even come close to this many seasons. Fight me. You’ll lose.

“Thank you.” “Shhh. We’re not talking.”

None of the progress we make in Criminal Minds: Evolution 17×06 would be possible without the unwavering support Tara gives Dave. In fact, without Dr. Lewis, we’re not so sure how much longer there would be an Agent Rossi at all. As we see at the beginning of “Message in a Bottle,” Dave is just…not ok. We’ve known this all season, sure. But adding that vivid, horrifying nightmare into the mix — followed by eleventy-billion Voits popping up and totally distracting him in the middle of trying to get the team to regroup — shows us just bad the situation actually is. And it’s worse than we, or probably anyone, especially Dave, could’ve imagined. But it’s ok. Because Tara is the hero Dave needs. The hero we need, even.

“Look: It’s not a secret that you’ve been struggling. And it’s not a weakness to talk about it.”

While the Jemily scenes take the (mostly) lighthearted approach to showing what unwavering support looks like, Lewis and Rossi’s scenes in Criminal Minds: Evolution 17×06 stick to a more direct, serious tone. To be clear, both work beautifully. And neither is more or less appropriate than the other as a general rule. Instead, each individual gets the care that they need and deserve, in the way that fits not just who they are but also what their dynamic is with the person showing up to help them. Lewis gives Rossi time and space to come to terms with what’s happening to him. But the best, most effective, thing she offers him is also the easiest to give: her presence. Just being there.

“You know something that I love about when it’s just you and me working a case? We can just…sit together, you know? Quietly. With our thoughts. So, I’m thinking…why don’t you and I just sit here now? Together. Quietly. And you can know that you’re ok.”

Sometimes, just having someone sit beside you and acknowledge — silently — what you’re going through, yet that they’re here when you’re ready, is all that’s necessary. In fact, we’d argue that what Tara does for Dave here is extremely underrated. Often, people think being concerned is being incredibly in your face about it. But not everyone benefits from that kind of care. In fact, some of us — literally “us.” Hi. I’m in this comment — will run screaming in the other direction if we feel smothered. So these moments the characters share, and Tara’s simply suggestion to just be, wind up being so very personal to me. Because, though I’ve never exactly had David Rossi’s set of experiences or reactions to them, I know how meaningful quality time from someone who gets what quality looks like for you — and that it’s not leaving you alone but also not bugging you — can be.

…and the work from Aisha Tyler here, as Tara oh-so-carefully presents her idea to to Dave, is second to none. Even the way she takes her seat, then waits until he offers his hand to take it, creates such a beautiful moment. And she’s not the only brilliant actor here. We can clock the very second Dave stops pushing back and starts slowly letting Tara in — because Joe Mantegna brings all of that, and more, to the performance. Their later scene together, when Rossi works his way up to admitting Voit’s “taking over” and Lewis ultimately helps him realize he has to go see Voit, is also just jam-packed with some fabulous, yet subtle, emotional work.

But for at least this reviewer, that first scene reigns supreme. And the way the camera just…lingers, the way Tyler kinda offers us that small grin as she reaches her arm around to add her second hand to their clasped ones…it’s such a real, raw, human moment. And a gorgeous one at that.

See also, my unhinged notes:

• Even the way his face goes through these micro-expressions and his posture is very…”I don’t want to but…” as he does.
• When he turns his hand up for her to take, I lose it.
• She smiles and takes it. I lose it some more.
• The time the camera WAITS with them, and her smile, and her wrapping her second hand under their clasped ones…help.
• Sometimes, all you need is someone to keep you company! Tara gets me!!!

So, yeah. Good stuff. 10/10. Bravo.

More on Criminal Minds: Evolution 17×06

• The entire opening nightmare sequence…wow. The way it’s shot as if we’re in it with Dave, every single reaction off Mantegna, Tyler yelling “Dave!”, Brewster singing “When You’re Smilin'” in that thin, shaky voice as that’s happening, the slow-motion after dream Emily is shot…just all of it is so well done. And also: A complete attack on me, personally.
• Another thing to consider: Look who Rossi’s partner is during the nightmare; even his subconscious knows where he can get help.
• Penelope taking care of Emily. <33333333333
• Everyone’s reactions to Dave essentially losing it…Yes.
• “So. Spill it: What’s going on with Emily.” The way JJ “profiled” that Emily would be sleeping at Penelope’s? That’s love.
• …and also just people knowing Penelope Garcia is a caring unicorn.
• If we’re still on “how’s JJ doing after that website revelation” watch, the way she deals with Penelope alone shows so much progress. (But my earlier point about wishing we got more of someone taking care of her in that still stands.)
• The whole “Teresa’s in trouble” thing turning out to be just 1) Sebastian getting revenge for Tyler cloning his phone and 2) an excuse to make things (even more?) awkward for the whole Garvez + Tyler Green dynamic…weirdly doesn’t upset me. It probably should. And yet.
• “…because the only thing more awkward than you working with Tyler is him working with me.” Cracked up at Tyler coming to summon Luke right after he said that. Bonus points for Adam Rodriguez’s face basically screaming “FML NO.” This show is a comedy! What serial killers?????
• “But also: you went in there, and then he went, and…”
• “I do. Talk About it.” “With who?” “Emily.” And then, the way Tara just whispers “Dave.” Much like her screaming for him to come see a dying Luke during the nightmare, I’m not getting this out of my head either.
• “Everything’s fine. Until. It’s not.” Me, having a blast with all the Jemily in this episode before they punch me in the feels.
• “Emily Elizabeth Prentiss. Are you high?” “I’m not not high.” You can not tell me that JJ doesn’t love Emily Elizabeth. Not after the way she lights up watching Emily like…that. Absolutely not. She’s like this the whole time: 😍😂🥰.
• “I didn’t know super hot latina was your type! ….my name is Garcia.” Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever change.
• Love everything about how Kirsten Vangsness does Penelope, always. But, for the purposes of this episode, it’s the way she builds to a lot of the bigger moments. The nervous chatter, then physically forcing Tyler’s face back to hers, leading up to the “who is she and why is she here” statement. And later, the way Garcia relishes getting to build a story around Teresa’s phone getting hacked. You can tell she’s loving getting to make Tyler nervous/guilty before coming in with the big “aha!” moment. Like, there’s a lot more. But those are two faves.
• Oh! And also this: “Oh. Yeah. They would. The better idea is to lie to your friends, clone phones, and…get shot by the psychopath who killed your sister.” The sass!
• The way the pieces of this episode are edited to fit together is, as a nerd who watches way too much TV, some of the coolest I’ve seen in a while. 1) Luke and Penelope getting the Teresa/Tyler backstory. 2) “How do you manage it?” “Some days better than others” before the immediate transition to Dave and Tara. 3) JJ’s high AF “why are the walls closing in” line, followed immediately by…Dave in the elevator, where he starts hallucinating those walls closing in. Very, very different tones, yet a perfect transition.
• “Sometimes, I talk to the UnSubs in my head. It helps me profile.But now, I’m talking to Voit all the time. And it’s —…” “Unwanted. “Yes.” “Intrusive?” “Hell yes.” Superb from Tyler and Mantegna on this back-and-forth. Love how they finish each other’s sentences and how simply…lets the frustration take over on that last line.
• “There is no shortcut through this. And…ignoring it is only going to make it worse.” Louder!
• The “please don’t make me” look when Tara puts her hand on Dave’s shoulder, though.
• “I would like to acknowledge the, uh, sticky? Chemistry? That is in the room between us all.” Again: Never. Change.
• Emily’s just gonna run through some fields and catch some rye, y’all. And, once again, JJ’s like: 😍.
• “I need something sweet. I overdosed on salt.”
• Tyler and Luke actually coming to an understanding was…surprisingly a thing I liked?
• Not sure what we can say about the way Joe Mantegna and Zach Gilford play off each other so well that we haven’t already said this season, but it seems like every time they get a chance to go at it face-to-face, they get better. Voit getting to hep Rossi profile himself, when he’s so obviously such a giant fan, is every bit as frustrating for Rossi as it is pure entertainment for Voit (and us).
• “Nothing is worse than you.” “Think about what you just said, Dave. Right there. Nothing is worse than me? You would never give me that satisfaction — never! Never, ever, ever. Unless…unless your repression is so deep, you’d rather lie to me than face the truth. But I think you and I can figure out that truth. Together.” Heartbreaking: The worst person you know just made a great point. (Again.)
• Is this where we make some kind of sappy comment about how North Star is what you look for “when you’re lost and desperate,” so Jemily are each other’s North Star in that context or.
• “Oh no! You found out!” The facepalm and whining. (But literally, Emily, sweetheart…did you really think she never would?)
• Anyone else lose it over the framed photo of Baby!Garcia and Baby!Prentiss behind the couch?
• “…because her grandson isn’t even brave enough to tell his coworker how he feels about her.” That’s two episodes in a row of folks telling Garvez about themselves. Just saying.
• Also: “No. She knows I love her.” Does she really get the how you love her part, though? Hm. Sources say no.
• No, you shouldn’t find a different dating pool. WTAF.
• “…one of those big whiteboards where we can put all our case details on. Like you guys…” Voit totally writes fanfiction about the BAU, with him in it. Fight me.
• Does Voit a memory like Reid’s or what. (Ok. That’s blasphemy. Please accept my repentance…but still. As close to it as mere mortals can manage, maybe?) My God. Like, dude’s out here, just…quoting random lines of text back at Rossi, from sh*t he wrote decades ago.
• The way. The realization. Dawns. On. Him. Joe Mantegna, y’all.
• Luke and Tyler: enemies to lovers, apparently. Like, we’re bonding over films now? Did we watch Suits and ship Marvey or something???
• Get you someone who looks at you like Emily Prentiss looks at Jennifer Jareau when she plays with her chopsticks.
• Can I get a Prentiss facepalm gif or.
• “So. What’s it gonna be?” “Grab your keys. Let’s f*ckin roll.” Yes!” And the way JJ hits the table.
• “I can’t…I can’t drive.” “Well, I can’t drive.” “…ride share?” I love them.
• “Seriously???!!!” “What?” “Well, things are complicated enough already, dontcha think?” I love her. (Also, is Luke really that clueless? Because if so, I’m once again asking why are men.)
• “And that’s why we never published. It started to feel like a recipe.” Uh, because it was.
• Kinda cool how every single member of the team got to read off part of Rossi and Gideon’s recipe before the big reveal. But, like, let’s not. Ok? Ok.
• “Voit helped me to see it. Where Gold Star began. It began with North Star. And North Star? North Star…is us. The BAU.” Well, F—.
• And, as we know, Voit most certainly said something to Damien about that. Which the BAU doesn’t know.
• So, again, I say: Well, F—.

What did you think of Criminal Minds: Evolution 17×06 “Message in a Bottle”? Leave us a comment!

New episodes of Criminal Minds: Evolution stream Thursdays on Paramount+.

THIS SEASONS REVIEWS

• ‘Criminal Minds: Evolution’ 17×03 Review: “Homesick”
• ‘Criminal Minds: Evolution’ 17×04 Review: “Kingdom of the Blind”
• ‘Criminal Minds: Evolution’ 17×05 Review: “Conspiracy vs. Theory”
• ‘Criminal Minds: Evolution’ 17×06 Review: “Message in a Bottle”