‘Evil’ 4×09 Review: “How To Build A Chatbot”

In a less evil world, we’d be discussing Evil 4×09 as a successful penultimate episode of Season 4. With many more seasons to come. But, of course, that’s not where we are. Instead, it’s oddly both a lead-in to a season finale and somewhere stuck in the middle of a 14-episode run that’s not quite a single season but also not…not one. With the case in “How To Build A Chatbot” being all about the dangers of AI chatbots — using the specific “be careful what you wish for” example of contacting our dearly departed — we suppose our obligatory plea for someone to save the series should involve something about asking the bots to write new episodes for us once there’s no new material left.

However, that really, really doesn’t work for us. Because no way are we ever going to encourage that garbage to take creatives’ jobs. Nope. Not even as a joke. Like, we literally had a whole Hot Strike Summer that was at least partially about this. (It probably feels like a lifetime ago because there have been about a billion news cycles, but it was just last year, actually. What an exhausting time to be alive.) So, we guess we should vow to pull a Leland?

Anyway.

Evil 4×09 is a good episode — right up until it’s a great one, with every indication that the sh*t is well and truly on its way to hitting the fan. Definitely an epic setup for whatever comes next, and it even ends with the (literal) calm before the storm. Well done. But we can’t help but think it would’ve done its job of making us like “OMG! FINALE! NOW!” so much better if we weren’t dreading the actual end.

“This is evil!” — Captain Obvious, Standing in for Sister Andrea

Pretty sure every single one of us has someone we’d like to talk to again, if even just once. But, as we see in Evil 4×09, there’s no way some app, released company that’s out to just make money by building a false version of those people, is ever going to be satisfying. And we see the flaws in the programming pretty early on, as the AI version of Monsignor Korecki comes up with one of the happiest days of Father Ignatius’ life but not the happiest day. A previous happiest day, before the soul-weighing machine, sure. But still…the bot is not, can never be, him.

That doesn’t mean that these imitations are completely useless, though. The stand-in for Ben’s mom not only “knows” exactly how to deal with his and Karima’s bickering, but she also points him toward a doctor for a…rather unorthodox solution to his djinn-slash-migraine problem. And it seems to help when Kristen and David offer him his (checks notes) tin hat and fedora. So, there’s that. And, if nothing else, it gives us many possibilities to explore for how the AI version of David said…all of that. (No, we’re not talking about the whole “whore of Babylon” diatribe either. Obviously, we mean — and are forever here for — the stuff that sounded like it was straight out of bad fanfiction. Someone get on writing the good version(s). Please and thank you.)

“I found it to be full of false hope.”

…but it’s David’s experience with the bot that stands out the most. Even knowing the “Julia” bot isn’t real, and even knowing the software could accurately reproduce voices by hearing Matthew’s messages to Frank, he has such a strong reaction to her voice. So strong, in fact, that he just looks off at the next day’s meeting with the coder. And as Evil 4×09 continues, David’s remaining encounters with his personal ghost don’t get any less emotional. In fact, they just keep building.

“Sister Andrea was right. This is evil. Using how much i love you. To make money.”

The emotion in Mike Colter’s voice on the line about making money alone is absolutely everything. And when we look at the long, drawn out sequence of David having to work himself up to putting her name in the program in the first place, the visceral reaction to seeing her image in the mirror on his phone, or even how much longer we spend with David’s decision to delete the “Last Connection” app from his devices, it’s painfully obvious how….well, painful this remains for him. It’s also no surprise, in the end, that Demon!Kristen chooses that moment of vulnerability to swoop in to “save” the day. But instead of staying with that fantasy, he knows he can reach out to the real deal.

…and he does, giving us this great moment with our trio. One that will be a lasting memory for them as all Hell breaks loose around them, and one that we can hang onto when the series is gone. Canned margaritas, a group of friends contemplating the darkness in the world and maybe giving our favorite priest a little bit of a hard time for his very thoughtful answers…that’s the good stuff. And that’s what’s important — getting to make the memories with the people we love now. While we still can. It’s not like we needed Evil 4×09 to teach us this lesson. We also, most definitely, didn’t need a lesson about tech bros rushing out embarrassingly bad imitations of the human experience for profits.

But who even cares about whether or not we needed the messaging, when the journey was so entertaining and the destination just embodies everything we love about our three central characters? Not us. So, to our earlier point about not wanting to advocate for AI-generated episodes when the real deal is stolen from us: Only human writers with real souls could give us these characters. Not to mention, no one and nothing can ever replace the certain magic that is the combination of Mike Colter, Katja Herbers, and Aasif Mandvi.

Which means we’re back to our other earlier point: How about we pull a Leland…or at least talk about that for a bit?

“Welcome to the Beginning of the End”

Evil 4×09 has a lot of really, really good elements. But the giant “holy f*ck” of Leland killing The Manager in retaliation for firing him…wow. Just…wow. (And did we also mention holy f*ck????) Just everything, from the opening presentation, to Leland’s grand entrance, to him turning around and blaming The Manager for baptizing Timothy is just so incredibly well done. And can we talk about the pure dedication of Michael Emerson as he chows down on some tasty demon heart and (pretty sure) guts??? We always talk about Emerson’s portrayal as delightfully evil, fun, condescending even. But this is next level. Scary, in fact.

“My will be done.”

But we also have to back up a bit and discuss how we got here. First of all, it’s both cruel and 100% true to life that, just as the women were starting to get crumbs for their hard work — just as things looked like they might finally be looking up for Sheryl — everything came crashing down. Then, there’s the scene in Evil 4×09 that makes Leland desperate enough to poison The Manager and announce to everyone at DF that he’s a traitor in the first place. If we didn’t have that intense ending to point to, we’d still say “How To Build A Chatbot” is a big episode for Emerson and a big one for the series as a whole.

First up, he sounds like a true believer in evil (and against the teachings of the Church):

“Do you really think that magic water can turn the bad to the good? Evil is not about whether or not you’ve been baptized or go to church! True evil is about…nurturing, how to…train, to teach, to raise a child. I have the most perfect teacher, nurturer, mother there is.” 

Considering how many people in this world have been baptized, do go to church, and are still evil AF — many of the absolute worst people and policies in American politics, for example…’nuff said — a lot of what Leland says in that moment rings true. And then, there’s the big reveal that, again, we’d be like “jaw on the floor” about if not for what happens near the end.

“…true whore of Babylon, the real Jezebel. Someone who has rejected God. and faith. A lustful adulterer who has cheated on her husband, who has been demonically possessed, who has murdered a man! The true mother of the antichrist is Kristen Bouchard!”

To see the montage of so many of these things actually happening to Kristen, all the moments we’ve loved across four seasons, as Leland says this is to know what a master plan looks like. Not just from the fictional Leland, no — though he’s been a brilliant puppet master all along, which we kinda knew but love having validated here — but from the entire creative team. Here it is. This is what having a clear vision and executing it looks like. And it’s something that feels far too rare in TV these days, yet should be the norm. If it wasn’t all planned from the beginning, at least there’s an actual awareness of series history and understanding that characters should drive the plot. Again, far too rare but should also be the norm.

Delivering those lines is also just…another home run for Emerson. The way his sense of pure delight builds with each part of his recap of this series, only to be downright gleeful by the time he says the name Kristen Bouchard…wow. Just. Iconic. Not that we’d want it to — pretty sure we’ve made that part clear all season — but if Evil, and the world, ended here, it would be one hell of a way to go out.

…and yet, there’s more to come. Buckle up.

More on Evil 4×09

• “IT TAKES ONLY 50 SECONDS TO WATCH THIS INTRO: A HAUNTING LASTS A LIFETIME. DON’T RISK IT.” Hear me out: If I do risk it and skip all the intros…will the demons save Evil for me???? Or did we get canceled because too many of y’all skipped the intro in the first place?
• Wallace Shawn brings so much emotion to the opening scenes, and I really love the way Andrea Martin meets that in Sister Andrea’s usual, unflinching sort of way. But I am once again asking if “inconceivable!” is under copyright. Because, seriously. WTF.
• “You’re such an early bird. It’s a wonder we get along.” Me when my cat tries to wake me up early for breakfast.
• “Do you think it’s Leland?” “Yes.” Always listen to Sister Andrea.
• “AI works with such massive datasets that it often isn’t up-to-date on current events.” No but this case is so perfectly-tailored to all things Ben, and he knows it. Love that for him!!!
• “Your dead loved ones can stay in touch with you if you have some old emails and some…samples of their voice.” Or. If you’re normal, you can just cry over the same card you received from your Grannie when you were in college every time you’re having a bad day and take it out to remember her. A friend told me.
• “You think the algorithm is possessed.” “Ben.” The tone and the look David gives Ben here both scream “Father is asking you not to act up.”
• Dude sounds way too excited about how good their voice imitation is, especially when he’s talking about someone dying of cancer. Soulless ghouls, these people are.
• (Is “soulless ghouls” redundant? Eh.)
• “How is this not manipulating her emotionally?” GET HIM. “That’s…the intent. It’s to offer comfort.” Love the reaction that’s a combination of “???” and “WTAF” from Herbers here.
• “Initially, I said no. Because I thought an artificial extension of a personality would prevent someone from accepting death. But then—“ “…they offered you money.” That part. GET HIM, BEN.
• The music as Sheryl and Leland prepare to do battle. 💀
• I love absolutely everything about the men falling down through the glass ceiling, Leland rushing through to save the day, and that one oblivious loser just taking a step into the slow fall right in front of Leland’s face. Hilarious when Leland looks at his phone switchblade like “??? Useless,” too. The whole thing is not only some great wish fulfillment (before disaster strikes later, of course) and just perfectly paced. We really get to savor the bit instead of rushing through. 10/10 for the beam hitting that one dude in the balls, too. I said what I said.
• “You all got bonuses.” “No. The men got bonuses; we got gift certificates to Victoria’s Secret.”
• “Leland. Do you want a hug?” We stan a condescending, gloating queen!
• Also: “Good luck with unemployment.” And that fantastic cackle.
• Yeah, we loved Christine Lahti’s performance in the previous episode and all, but when she gets to be this version of Sheryl, that is 100% our favorite.
• The camera perspectives in this episode…oh, yes. You kinda get this sense that we are all being watched, all the time. Creepy AF.
• Her heels! In the crushed glass!
• “I like looking up. Where the men used to be.” Evil Grandma for POTUS, tbh.
• Can we get a spinoff that’s just Karima and Ben bickering?
• If you think I didn’t scream at “what are you wearing,” you must be new here. And then, the rest of it…
• …they gave the people what they want.
• I am the people.
• “Sexting? Really, Father Acosta?” When there are 19230483 fics on AO3 with this line in them…send them to me.
• “It’s ok if you’ve moved on. I understand.” Immediately after Chatbot!David said whatnow?
• The gasping breath when Kristen lurches forward and slams that laptop closed.
• “Sheryl.” “Oh, please. That dumb bitch couldn’t have trained Ted Bundy.” First, how dare. Second…she literally made Kristen who she is today.
• “Believe in a mother with a dark heart.” Oh, but I do.
• Kristen telling David about what his bot said…so awkward.
• “We’re still good, right?” “You mean because my avatar tried to have sex with you?” The GIGGLING. “I think we’re good.” “Good.” THEIR DUMB GRINS.
• “We” are not good. (We is me.)
• “You got a…tin foil hat there, buddy.”
• “You’re a man of science. Now, you’re wearing tinfoil hats and sleeping like a baked potato.” “Well, a man of science is a man of trial and error. If it keeps you away, then it’s science.” Is this…growth?
• “Because it’s working. And I don’t want you making fun of me for it.” …hm. Maybe…not growth? 
• The…single rose…that was actually…oh. Again. I screamed. And I regret nothing.
• The way David gets so protective when he asks why the delivery guy is taking a pic, too!
• The “oh my God” is fantastic.
• “Your program sent someone to her house.” “…with a thong.” I—. This show is a romcom!
• “One last suggestion for you?” “Delete the app.” Things I constantly say to myself about Twitter…but always fail at listening to.
• Once again going to say holy f*ck to Leland’s big takeover.
• Get you a friend who will get out of his baked potato bed to come have canned margaritas with you and your girl right before the world ends.
• Kristen and Ben cracking up at David’s “go with the flow” line. Same.
• “We expect the weirdness.” When you open the Paramount+ and begin a new episode of Evil.
• “I don’t know. I’m out of lessons. This is the most normal I’ve felt…” And this is how we know we are so f*cked.
• “Sooooo…drink up.”
• Their little canned margarita toast. I LOVE THEM.
• But uh. Yeah. Drink up.
• Tornado, hurricane, possible frogs…sounds about right.

Thoughts on Evil 4×09 “How To Build A Chatbot”? Leave us a comment!

New episodes of Evil stream each Thursday on Paramount+.