Welcome to the spot where The Summer I Turned Pretty book readers and non-book readers are on equal footing. None of us knows what is going to happen, none of us knows who will be together and who won’t. Somehow, going into this episode, The Summer I Turned Pretty, Season 3, Episode 9, it feels as though I am reading the series for the first time.
And that’s exciting to me.
So many people are asked the question – if you could read a book again for the first time, what would it be? For me, it’s this entire series. It felt like the most amazing thing to turn on Prime Video, press play on The Summer I Turned Pretty, and to feel as if I was reading the series again for the first time.
And that felt thrilling.
You see, I believe that some things shape you. Moments in life where you are faced with the feelings that felt impossible, the security you couldn’t find, and the love that you dreamt of. Maybe all of these things won’t happen to you. But either way, it’s a journey of finding yourself.
That road may not be easy to follow, and you may not be able to predict it, but it is there. Watching Belly and everyone go down the road to who they are going to be – I will sit and watch it every single time.
THE AIRPORT
Sometimes running is the most comfortable and safest thing. I don’t think that staying to “face” things is always the answer, and sometimes you have to step aside and remember who you are and what you fought for.
I don’t really think that Belly ran away. Belly ran towards something.
Herself.
Yet, as I say that, to the person that stopped her from walking towards Conrad in that airport – bite me.
I’ve never made a secret that I believe that Conrad and Belly belong together. Did he go about things the wrong way? Well, the answer to that is subjective. For me, I don’t know that there ever would have been a right time.
And yet, I think that she always knew how Conrad felt. I just think she also buried it so deep, but I think that a lot of us do things like that when it comes to first loves.
And Conrad Fisher is hers.
Growing and changing isn’t easy. It is one of those things that we can’t fight, but what we can do is find a way to navigate the roads that life takes us down.
We all deal in our own ways. Jeremiah decided to get drunk and hopefully not feel anything. Feeling things means that he has to feel his regrets and fears, too. I think that Jeremiah is in pain, but I will also say it time and time again – he should also take his share of the blame.
I know that hindsight is 20/20. And maybe one day he will look back and see clearly. Maybe she will, too.
I can’t get over Steven and Taylor being there for Jeremiah instead of trying to find Belly. That’s your sister, Steven, and if you only knew all of the things that she hasn’t told you.
STEVEN AND TAYLOR
Ok – finally someone tells Steven what Jeremiah did, and I am so thankful that it was Taylor. I am so thankful that she broke it to him, but also let her guard down enough to let him in.
Steven and Taylor are complicated, but they always have been.
Maybe the only good thing to come out of this whole thing is that Steven and Taylor found the courage to admit their feelings and not back down from them. They’ve laid it all out on the line – hearts bare on the floor – every misinterpretation examined.
Steven and Taylor are both afraid of love and yet crave it. They want to feel like there isn’t anything that they can’t move past. They want to be loved for who they are.
And yet, I also think that they have to be vulnerable and show up for each other. I don’t know if they can always do that, but here’s the beautiful thing about life – it’s about trying.
And seeing these two want to try is a situation I can get behind.
PARIS
There is something about Belly seeing Paris for the first time and Taylor Swift playing in the background that makes me burst into tears. She’s gonna make it – I know that she will. Regardless of what happened in Boston, she needs her space. Her moment.
But Paris isn’t starting like she expected it to. The program that she went for was filled, and her fear of failure takes over. Belly’s life has been measured by summers, and suddenly, those memories of summers don’t matter the same. Everything is tainted.
And she is alone.
The program made a mistake, and they didn’t have space for her. Belly’s embarrassed by hopping on a plane to Paris, but I think she should be proud of herself. She dared to take a chance.
When contacting Laurel, she tells Belly to come home, and Belly, wel,l she’s not ready to, but tells her Mom that she will.
When you’ve played your whole life safe and close to the chest, doing the opposite of that is terrifying. I can’t blame Laurel for wanting to protect her daughter, but I also am hoping she finds a way to let her flourish.
Belly deserves that.
Paris is a good idea for Belly. Figuring out who she is – that’s a good idea for Belly. Giving her the space that is necessary for her to deal with her pain is the only thing that will bring her back home.
THE MORNING AFTER
Steven and Taylor being there for Jeremiah – I am kinda angry about. I am angry that rather than hunting Belly down to figure out what is happening. Steven – you are her brother.
For a second, I am hurting for him, and I understand acting out in pain – I get it. Acting out in pain is something we do in order to make sense of things. But man, loyalty is all over the place here, and it’s not where it should be.
But there are some things that I can’t find forgiveness in, and that would be with the things that Jeremiah says to Laurel when she’s checking on him. I get it, she wasn’t in favor of anything in the first place. Jeremiah needs to recognize, though, that he wasn’t ready for this wedding either.
By his own admission, he has known that Belly was in love with his brother, too. It’s this weird balance – feeling bad for Jeremiah and also disliking him in the same moment. He’s not been the smartest about his life, but him letting people believe that Belly is the one who broke it off. He did.
Jeremiah has regrets, and I get that. We all live with them. They all have regrets. He still loves Belly, and I appreciate that he does. But again, his cruelty when Belly calls and lays out that she’s in Paris and needs to figure out who she is – uncalled for.
STAY
Belly’s made some new friends in Paris. Her chasing down her stolen backpack was epic in the sense that it proved to her that she can accomplish anything. There was this part of Belly that looked shocked that she was capable of that.
But that is the thing about Belly – she’s always underestimating herself. And that’s what is exciting about Paris. She’s found the courage to figure out who she is.
And it’s her new friends in Paris that remind her that in her 20s, she’s bound to leave some damage. Belly’s always been responsible, but maybe, just maybe, she needs to remember that life is meant to be lived.
Heading back to the airport, Belly makes a choice to call Jeremiah. It’s as if he’s forgotten that he was the one who called everything off. He has to have everything on his terms and in the moments that he wants them. So when Belly says that she needs to stay in Paris and she needs to figure out who she is – I applauded her. I remembered why I dislike Jeremiah when he tells her never to call him again.
There were several curse words screamed at the television.
Jeremiah – you’re just wrong when you go back to the house and you see your brother and you are methodically cruel to Conrad. Taking joy in telling Conrad that Belly is in France and that she isn’t coming back – well, that was just a lot.
Jeremiah straight up looks like he’s lost his mind.
At one point, I will only hope and pray that these two find a way to be the best of friends – because they are brothers. Conrad knows he’s messed up, and he also knows that he has to be honest.
I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Adam is gross. Let’s admit that. Adam is a bad parent, and he’s so oblivious to just what he is doing wrong. He expects Conrad to be there for Jeremiah, but it just shows that he’s never seen what his kids are dealing with.
He’s a bad Dad. Unfortunately, Jeremiah is a mini-Adam.
Conrad, having to tell his Dad everythin,g is begging for his Dad to tell him what to do. Conrad needs a parent. He needs his Dad to be a father to both him and Jeremiah. What kills me is how stupid Adam is to what is going on in his sons’ lives.
Conrad Fisher is carrying the weight of so much on his shoulders, and so he decides to just give up. But maybe Adam is right for once, Jeremiah needs space. Conrad leaving – he has to trust that Jeremiah is going to have people he can lean on.
For once, Adam steps up to be there for his sons, and he goes to Jeremiah. Still hate Adam, but also – am really glad he FINALLY steps up to the plate.
None of us really know what will happen next, but in The Summer I Turned Pretty fashion – it ends in a way that makes sense. Belly looking up at Notre Dame being rebuilt, and Belly’s voice saying, “Rebuilding is always possible. It has to be.”
OTHER THOUGHTS
- I really want to be invested in the new friends in France, just not there yet
- Belly getting her bag back was epic
- I won’t forgive Jeremiah for what he said to Laurel
- I hate that I feel for Jeremiah – both love and dislike him. Gavin did an amazing job this episode.
The Summer I Turned Pretty is streaming now on Prime Video.
