7 Simple Rules for Throwing a Super Bowl Party

Fair warning, I know nothing about Super Bowl parties. Or at least, I know nothing about throwing Super Bowl parties, and very little about attending them and being of any help. I do, however, know a lot about the Super Bowl. Falcons vs Patriots. The Falcons have never won a Superbowl in their entire history, and this is just their second appearance at the big game. The Patriots …well, the Patriots have won a lot. Recently.

(I’m not biased, no. I just want the Falcons to win. Wait, what do you mean that’s the exact definition of biased? Of course it’s not).

So, why am I writing a piece on how to throw a Super Bowl Party? Because I enjoy parodies. Also, it’s another chance to make my allegiance clear. Finally, because I would like to think everyone can enjoy the Super Bowl weekend, whether you actually like the game or not.

So, here are my 7 simple rules for throwing a Super Bowl party:

Don’t assume everyone is there for the same reasons you are

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Some people are there for the half-time show, others for the commercials. Some of us don’t even care about those two things. And that’s fine – to each its own. Don’t try to force your way to enjoy the day onto others. Do you, and let others do them.

Let me repeat; don’t try to force others into your way of enjoying the day

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Also, don’t feed into tired and clichéd stereotypes of how men and women should enjoy the day. If I want to shun the half-time show to discuss second-half strategy, that’s just as valid as just wanting to enjoy the commercials and sing along to whoever is headlining this year.

(Real story, I have no idea who’s playing in the half-time show this year. Ask me about the game, though)

That being said, if other people want to share in your enjoyment, let them

Big games are the perfect moment to create new fans – of anything, so there’s no need to rein in your enthusiasm, especially when others want to be included.

Fair warning, though, NO ONE wants questions on 3rd and 2, and no one wants questions in the middle of what is only like 2 songs for their favorite artist. Pick your moments.

Beverages and snacks are more important than food

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Mostly for convenience sakes, and also because, when you get nervous, you want something to snack on. And if the Super bowl is anything like recent Super bowls, there’ll be plenty of chances to get nervous.  I eat when I get nervous – don’t you?

But get food. If you’re throwing a party, expect people to spend the more than a few hours

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And get easy-to-eat stuff. Don’t cook something fancy. Not many people will notice. In fact, don’t cook at all. Not many people will notice. I’ve been to plenty a Super bowl party and I don’t remember what I ever ate in them. I can, however, tell you the score of at least the last ten Super bowls. So, wings. Pizza. Hot dogs. Burgers. And probably more than you think people can eat. Nerves are a bad, but bad thing.

I’m serious, people will never leave

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Before the game, they’ll want to hear the pundits. After the game, they’ll want to see the celebrations. This is the one of the biggest sporting events of the year – people don’t want to end, and they’ll milk it for all it’s worth. Don’t commit to it unless you’re sure you can handle it.

Pick a team

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Even if it’s just for laughs. It’s part of the fun. Understand the game? Make an informed decision based on what you can live with. Don’t understand the game? Make an uninformed decision based on whatever you like. Flip a coin. Doesn’t matter. But the game is way more fun if you’re rooting for someone, one way or another.

(Psssst. Don’t pick the Patriots. Don’t pick the Patriots)

So, what do you think about my rules? Do you have any actually useful recommendations for throwing a Super Bowl party? Who are you rooting for? Share with us in the comments below!

The Super Bowl will be played on Sunday February 5th at 6:30 ET. The AFC Champions – New England Patriots will face off against the NFC Champions – Atlanta Falcons.

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