Fear Street Part One: 1994 was a boring mess that only kept me locked onto the screen because of the promise of queer goodness. And this is coming from a queer reviewer who loves scary movies and doesn’t need much to have fun. But this movie took way too long to get to the point. And even then, I don’t know if I got the point. Who is this witch? Why are Sunnyvale highschoolers such douches? And are phone cords from the 90’s that long because I don’t remember them being hefty sized?
Questions. That’s all that Fear Street Part One: 1994 left me with. That and utter disappointment that they utterly squandered Maya Hawke. Ever since Stranger Things, I’ve wanted more of this actress. And I foolishly thought that she would live longer than 10 minutes. I really should’ve learned from Drew Barrymore in Scream. But I was brought in my Maya’s oddballness and 90’s fashion. Kudos on tricking me and luring me into a false sense of security with her. But that’s all you’re going to get from me.
The story wasn’t even scary. I was waiting for it. The jumps, the spooks, or the general skin crawly moments you get when you know the bad guy was right around the corner. But that never came, even when this creepy young woman was singing on the side of a road or when an axe murderer popped up in the woods. None of it scared me. Even the deaths were lacklustre. Not saying I want more gore. In fact, less gore would be great. I just need a little more creativity and not just the same ol’. Where’s the mystery? The intrigue? Not here.
Also, it had these moments where you’re like, “Am I really seeing this go down?” The only Latino was a possessed murderer who went around killing teens even after death. The only Black man was arrested for the murders even though the white cop saw the mask wearing guy stab Maya Hawke’s character right in the chest. The only Black girls we saw were separating drugs into baggies because their babysitter couldn’t do it? Wait, what? Josh, the only Black character with more than a couple lines is a bit of a stereotype but a required one with all the answers and who ends up saving the day over and over and ends up being this movies saving grace.
The lesbians, or queer women, were legit the only reason why I kept going. Maya Hawke was dead in the first 10 minutes, everyone and the story was boring, and I was this close to exiting out of the movie and watching Nailed It while surfing Reddit. But then the lesbians arrived and Sam was revealed to be a girl who Deena was in love with. I praised the queer gods for finally bringing me some good stuff and kept watching because I was adamant that they were going to survive or I was going to lose it.
Technically, they survived. Sure, Sam was killed by Deena to “end” the curse upon them. But she was brought back and they were in bed together, all cuddled up and having a nice time. Then the witch had to interrupt them and somehow possess Sam and turn her into a stabby maniac. Thankfully, Deena’s household has one of the longest phone cords I’ve ever seen that she was capable of tying up a struggling Sam until she could show Josh what the heck was going on. And honestly, I’m left wondering if I even care to watch Part 2 of this series.
Because, yes the lesbians saved Fear Street Part One: 1994 for me. But I don’t know if they’re enough for me to watch two others movies where I will get less time with Deena and Sam because the killers of the past have to somehow be broken down to understand what the witch is after in 1994. It feels hopeless, wasn’t entertaining, and I’ll probably end up reading a review to figure out what happened to my gays like you’re probably doing at this very moment. Trust me, save yourself the time and don’t watch Fear Street Part One: 1994.
But just in case, Fear Street Part One: 1994 is available now on Netflix.
