When it comes to Not Dead Yet, what they’ve been able to do is balance the seriousness with the comedy. They’ve managed to find a way to balance joy with pain. They’ve managed to make us see the beauty in moments.
And this episode was no different in making us find the beauty in moments.
Because saying goodbye and saying hello to possibilities of love and heartache, of future and past aren’t ever easy.
But they are necessary.
WHERE TO SCATTER
Sometimes, I think about where I would want to be buried or my ashes scattered. I don’t know where that would be. I have no clue, because death is something that I fear intensely. I guess, I wonder, when I am dead, who will I have left an impact on.
It scares me.
Watching this episode of Not Dead Yet, I can see why people would be afraid, but also I saw that the people left behind are scared. They don’t know how and when it’s okay to let go or if it’s even okay at all. Sometimes I think that it’s easier to bury someone, because then you know where they are.
Most likely you’ve gotten the knowledge from the person that has passed on where they want to be buried if they are indeed buried. But Monty, well, he was cremated and Crystal had no idea as to where to scatter his ashes.
But she does know that she is ready.
Nell and Edward volunteer to go with her, which I love, because everyone needs friends, especially when they are doing the hard things in life. It’s definitely not easy and it makes it even more difficult when Monty tells her where he wants to be buried, and that doesn’t seem to align with what Nell knows.
Even when they go to Crystals psychic, she isn’t giving what Monty wants, even as he’s right there. Nell tries to call her bluff, but she’s happy to call her out instead.
Crystal chooses the beach and what we soon realize is that we’re asking the wrong questions. See, Crystal wants to spread Monty’s ashes at the beach. Why? Because it’s where she went over and over again after he died and it’s where she felt like she found him again for the first time. It’s where she feels his presence.
Unfortunately we see Monty leave and I have to admit that I will miss him. I will miss him because Monty felt like words of wisdom every time we saw him.
WHERE TO SHARE THE GIFT OF LIFE
When you are thinking of a future, what do you think of? For some people it is about having children. For Dennis and his husband, it is about having kids. Dennis has slow swimmers, so it is his husband that will be furnishing the swimmers for the baby.
This means that Dennis needs to look at the potential egg donors.
If you watch the show, you know that Dennis IS NOT GOOD at making choices. He becomes overwhelmed by them and he lives with the fear of letting people down. He knows that having kids is a big choice and choosing an egg donor – that just feels impossible.
Leave it Sam and Lexi to tell him that they can help him. They want to make choices for him to make it easier, but when you see who they choose, you can tell it’s because they love him and want him to feel a part of the process and to see himself in the child.
Only the woman that they choose is really damn annoying and when they tell him that she is like him – he really just looks hurt and mad. But he’s breaking down because of it.
Sam and Lexi do what they should have done and call his hubby in. He and Dennis are able to talk it through and they decide to adopt. It’s a beautiful moment, one that we don’t see a lot on television. What I mean by that is it seems so real and so genuine.
Dennis draws you in, as the friend that you want, the friend you love, the friend that means everything. You’re rooting for him above all. I cheered seeing them so happy.
AN INTERNAL BATTLE
Nell is living with the biggest secret. She speaks to ghosts and in this episode she’s faced with, should she tell people?
The thing is, who would believe it? Would they think that she’s crazy? Would they judge? She’s not sure. But when she does almost tell Crystal, and then doesn’t, she realizes that she’s told people – the ghosts that she talks to.
Do I believe that Nell will tell someone, someday? Yes. But for now, I think she needs to figure out where she stands, where she grows, and the faith that she has in the ghosts and herself.
That’s the beauty of Not Dead Yet… it reminds us to live.
