144 Not So Deep Thoughts From ‘Outlander’ 2×02

Outlander is one of those things we just can’t stop having thoughts about. Deep ones, and not so deep ones. So, here’s a collection of our not so deep thoughts from episode 2×02 titled “Not in Scotland Anymore”

  1. I’m never getting this song out of my head. I will still be singing it in 50 years.
  2. This dress is amazing. And probably very uncomfortable.
  3. You like the bed Jamie? We like the bed.
  4. Okay, now I’m creeped out.
  5. And I need a drink
  6. It’s been like two minutes.
  7. This is the most disturbing opening scene ever, Outlander.
  8. Way to set the tone.
  9. Jamie needs a drink too.
  10. Don’t fold your clothes, Claire. People didn’t do that back then.
  11. You’re scaring the maid.
  12. Not that she could possibly arrive at the she’s from the future
  13. But still.
  14. Paris just isn’t Paris without the Eiffel Tower.
  15. Claire looks stunning.
  16. Like, she’s a beautiful woman, but this wardrobe does wonders for her.
  17. And she knows her stuff.
  18. Paris is pretty.
  19. Very pretty.
  20. Jamie is also pretty.
  21. Or handsome.
  22. And he’s putting on quite a show.
  23. Somehow I don’t think people are focusing on how good a fighter he is.
  24. Murtagh is my favorite.
  25. He’s homesick.
  26. He’s us.
  27. But dirtier.
  28. Way dirtier.
  29. Kill the prince, he says.
  30. Like it’s easy.
  31. All of Claire’s dresses look both gorgeous AND supremely unconformable.
  32. I bet she’d love to wear some pants.
  33. A brothel. How very cliché.
  34. How do you like your plans now Claire?
  35. Well, Jamie is supremely uninterested.
  36. I almost wish Claire were here to see it.
  37. Charles is boring.
  38. Is he supposed to be boring?
  39. I’m bored.
  40. He asks for the truth, but he doesn’t want it.
  41. And his wig is very distracting. All wigs are distracting.
  42. Please never wear a wig, Jamie. I BEG YOU.
  43. You’re too pretty to wear a wig.
  44. God demands. What a self-righteous ass this guy is. God demands indeed.
  45. Murtagh is the best. He’s never afraid to be brutally honest.
  46. More sympathetic ass indeed.
  47. God’s will – I hate that one more.
  48. And we thought Claire was going to be the one to win everyone over.
  49. Jamie in court!
  50. Claire in court.
  51. The dresses.
  52. I’m excited.
  53. Is that a robe or a curtain you’re wearing, Claire?
  54. I’m so glad we haven’t seen Frank yet.
  55. Too much Frank last episode.
  56. And by too much Frank, I mean any Frank is too much Frank.
  57. As good as naked, she says. She’s wearing more clothes than I wear on a normal day.
  58. The description of the man this poor girl is going to marry clinches it: Claire has the best husband in all of Paris.
  59. Maybe the world.
  60. Waxing is torture.
  61. And yet we still do it, to this day.
  62. Maybe we’re masochists.
  63. Claire seems intrigued. Too intrigued, I’d say.
  64. Oh, she went for it. Eh, good for you Claire!
  65. Maybe Jamie will like it.
  66. A+ on seduction techniques, Claire. You win this round.
  67. Finally, SOME LOVING.
  68. I spoke too soon, didn’t I?
  69. I spoke too soon.
  70. I hate you, Black Jack Randall. I hate you so much.
  71. And you, Frank.
  72. For reasons. Irrational reasons. That have to do with you wearing the same face as the bastard.
  73. This breaks my heart
  74. It’s broken.
  75. I need another drink.
  76. The civilized version of Murthag is kinda cute. He still looks like he could have spent more time grooming, though.
  77. Jamie’s face when Claire walks down is the stuff of romance novels.
  78. I want someone to look at me like that.
  79. Wait, strike that, I want Sam Heughan to look at me like that. Yes.
  80. Claire looks amazing. Even I’m having a hard time not staring at her.
  81. And, wow, that dress.
  82. Jamie’s moment of jealousy is kinda cute.
  83. Especially because it’s just a moment, over very soon. Jamie has learned his lesson about trying to control his wife.
  84. Look at you, Jamie, the modern man.
  85. Oh, look, Claire gets her turn at jealousy.
  86. Her moment is even better.
  87. Mostly because she doesn’t handle it as well as Jamie.
  88. If looks could kill.
  89. Claire could probably kill you in 25 different ways, honey.
  90. Won, she said.
  91. Won
  92. Like a prize.
  93. Claire’s face is the best thing in this episode. She’s having none of this.
  94. Don’t talk about duels a man fought for you in front of his wife. That’s just common courtesy.
  95. Jamie and Claire have the whole unspoken conversation thing down pat.
  96. Murtagh, you’ll accompany them.
  97. Go
  98. Now
  99. Is this a joke?
  100. Does everyone need to be present for this?
  101. I’ve lost all respect for the King already.
  102. And it’s been half a minute
  103. Trust Jamie to be helpful.
  104. But yeah, I wouldn’t want to eat porridge.
  105. I love your accent, Jamie. Ignore these idiots making fun of you.
  106. The level of conversation is remarkable.
  107. Our insults are better than yours, is basically what they’re saying.
  108. Do they want an award or something?
  109. Oh, Claire got a BIGGER FAN!
  110. Look at you, listening to your hubby.
  111. Oh, a setup. Lovely.
  112. I’m not going to like this one bit.
  113. You can’t get into a fight with this man, Claire. That could ruin everything.
  114. Sure, Claire, pick that remote spot.
  115. Make it easy.
  116. Was anyone faithful in that day and age?
  117. Is anyone faithful now?
  118. The things you learn about marriage while watching TV.
  119. Well, Jamie’s timing couldn’t be better
  120. Or worse.
  121. At least this guy seems to be much nice when he’s sober.
  122. Not that that was hard.
  123. His hair, though …his hair.
  124. The King looks much more, ahem, dignified now.
  125. I’m glad that bare nipples fashion never caught on.
  126. Really glad.
  127. Oh, this idiot again.
  128. Can we let Murtagh kill him?
  129. I already know the answer to that, but I don’t like it.
  130. Jamie does the politics game better than I expected.
  131. OMG
  132. THE YOUNGER BROTHER.
  133. OMG
  134. WHAT DO YOU MEAN TELL JONATHAN?
  135. JONATHAN IS DEAD
  136. Oh, God.
  137. He isn’t dead.
  138. NO, DON’T TELL JONATHAN ANYTHING
  139. PLEASE DON’T.
  140. I need another drink.
  141. At least we didn’t see Frank this episode. Or his APPARENTLY ALIVE ANCESTOR.
  142. Oh, my poor Jamie. This is going to break him.
  143. You have to tell him, Claire. You can’t keep this a secret. You can’t.
  144. But, maybe not tonight.

Outlander airs Saturday’s on Starz.

 

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