'Supergirl' 3×05: “Damage” Roundtable or, Why Sanvers Deserved Better

This week we’re back with a special Supergirl roundtable dedicated to Sanvers. This couple has come so far and we’re sad to see it end in heartbreak, not because we ship it like crazy, which we do, but because they were important parts of representation on TV for the LGBT community.

With Sanvers we saw two women get to know each other, tease, flirt, go undercover, and fall in love. And despite the problems they faced and the bumps along the way in the writing, we enjoyed the way that their relationship was just another part of Supergirl. It normalized a relationship that many still have a problem accepting as being a choice and a reality.

Our Fangirlish writers Alyssa, Lizzie, Lyra, Sarah, Lariel, Lacey, Kayla, Lori and our lovely guests Funmbi , from one of our favorite sites: We So Nerdy, and Hillary are breaking down the Sanvers breakup, Alex’s future, Floriana’s departure, and how Sanvers deserved better.

Here we go!

Let’s talk Sanvers. Can you talk about your feelings for the couple from their introduction to before you learned Floriana Lima was leaving. Did you ship it? What did the couple mean to you?

Alyssa: Sanvers was one of those unexpected ships that came our way last season. Like Lizzie, Alex Danvers was easily my favorite character in Supergirl’s first season. So I was clamoring for more of Alex’s story — not just her being Kara’s sister. I wanted to know Alex Danvers the person. And Sanvers was a huge storyline that defined her as an individual. The more we got between Alex and Maggie, the more I loved. They had a natural chemistry and a beautiful relationship in which they helped each other become better versions of themselves. That’s rare to find on television, especially in an LGBT relationship. This representation matters. And it was wonderful to see it done right. I shipped it. I shipped it like UPS.

Lizzie: Alex Danvers was my favorite character in Season 1, and Alex Danvers remained my favorite character in season 2. Maybe because, like her, I feel like I am a big sister above many other things, and that sometimes means that you put things on hold because it’s for the best of your sibling. So, to me, it was particularly exciting to see Alex get a storyline, to see her going through this process of figuring out who she was, falling in love with Maggie and just going for it. I always loved Alex more, but I enjoyed Sanvers, I shipped it and in a TV landscape that in general, seemed to be treating LGBT relationships like an afterthought, I was glad Supergirl was allowing them a chance to go through all the milestones.

Lyra: Sanvers felt like the representation I’ve been waiting for. From the very first moment they met I knew that this was going to be different because they treated it like any other couple. It was just two people meeting, finding out that they work remarkably well together, and slowly developing the feelings for each other. They had their ups and downs, their milestones, their blunders; all parts of being with somebody. I felt like we were on the brink of something fantastic until Floriana announced that she was leaving. That’s when the cracks started appearing for me and I focused more time on the storyline that they were going to take these two women on to separate them instead of appreciating what they meant and what they had done for LGBT relationships on TV. Now that they’re officially broken up I can look back on the relationship and appreciate what was done while acknowledging that they had their faults aka the way they broke up. This is but the first step of many for more representation on TV. And we can only hope that The CW continues to push for this representation on their shows.

Sarah: Maggie’s introduction was truthfully one of my favorite parts about last season. Her story was really wonderful to watch unfold as she grew closer to Alex, and their love story turned me into an instant Sanvers shipper. They brought out good things in each other, and despite their own individual struggles they fought tooth and nail for what they both believed in, and for their relationship. Truthfully I didn’t have a single issue with how their story was going until two things happened: Alex’s half rushed half panic proposal to Maggie, and Floriana announcing she was leaving Supergirl. I know it was going to go downhill from there as they obviously couldn’t stay together, but going down this route on the how left a bad taste in my mouth. I understand the writers probably had a different idea in mind if Floriana had stayed, but there’s always a better choice and frankly I don’t think they made it in this case. I really hope we get to see more LGBT representation on Supergirl, but in the future please handle it more carefully and with the respect it and your characters deserve.

Lariel: I enjoyed the introduction of Maggie to the Supergirl family. I liked Maggie. I thought she and Alex just worked well together. I can’t say I was a Sanvers “shipper” the way I’ve been with other shows & ships, but it was a pairing that worked for me the way some other pairings in the Arrowverse have not (Nate/Amaya in Legends, looking at you). I did think Alex’s proposal at the end of S1 was too much of a stress proposal. You DON’T go into marriage without having established lots of things. Like whether or not you want children.

Lacey: I had mixed feelings about Sanvers. While I was happy that Alex had found someone to share her life with, I felt like we lost a little bit of who Alex was in Season 1. Her and Kara were still close but it wasn’t that same sister bond we saw in the first season. I feel like Alex lost herself in her relationship. It was also hard for me to ship Sanvers because I wasn’t a big fan of Maggie. But at the end of the day, I was happy that there was a representation for the LBGT community on the show.


Kayla: I was excited when I saw that they introduced the coming out storyline for Alex. Excited to see where it was going to go. It had so much potential. At first, I even liked Maggie. However, as we got further into the season, I began to not really like Maggie very much. So, no I didn’t ship Sanvers, but I did love how beautiful the coming out storyline was done. There were many things that I felt were rushed in this relationship. Many things they could’ve been fleshed out better.

I tried very hard to ship Sanvers, and in the end I realized that I couldn’t because, despite my love for the plot, I didn’t like Maggie. If you dislike part of a ship, you have trouble shipping it. That’s what happened for me.

Despite not shipping them, for various reasons, I loved that it brought LGBT representation to the show that was desperately needed.

Alex and Maggie breaking up over having kids seemed like a realistic storyline to me. Because to me children was never something on Maggie’s radar, but I could always tell it was for Alex. However, the way they brought about the proposal and everything was rushed and even before I knew Floriana had decided to leave, I smelled doom for Sanvers because of how rushed it all was.

Lori: I loved their friendship, and eventual relationship, from the beginning. I’ve been in Alex’s shoes before – figuring out my sexuality because a friend was so open about their’s. I’ve been in Maggie’s shoes before – having a new friend confide in me about their burgeoning sexuality. I think that was done really well and, unfortunately, only a handful of show’s (Grey’s Anatomy and Chasing Life come to mind) have explored “coming out” from such an honest point of view.

Funmbi: When it became clear that SANVERS was happening, I was totally here for it for several reasons. I loved the idea of Alex finding love. She’s always had so much love to give and Alex certainly deserved to experience the joy of a romantic relationship. Maggie seemed to be such a good match for Alex. From the time they went on their crime fighting adventure to expose the underground alien fight club, you could tell that these were two women on the same level. As SANVERS got to know one another (and we got to know them), we saw that Alex and Maggie brought important things to the relationship. Maggie helped Alex to embrace and acknowledge an essential part of her identity. And Alex gave Maggie the experience of having a family that accepted her whole self, without question. Finally, LGBTQ representation in entertainment is critical, even in the DCTV universe, so SANVERS was a fantastic addition to that.

Hillary: I also have mixed feelings about #Sanvers, and mainly for the same reasons that Lacy mentioned. We saw the Alex we fell in love with during Season 1 become extremely tied up in her relationship, which is often because writers write queer relationships as these stereotypical obsessed kind of relationships. The whole relationship felt rushed and the audience missed out on key conversations to make this a three dimensional relationship, which is probably why I never fully shipped them. The CW has a history of creating the possibility of these amazing character arcs, but they always fall flat because of their writers – Sanvers was one of them.

Did Floriana Lima’s decision to leave make you reevaluate your feelings for the couple? What did you think/hope the writers were going to do with the storyline? What would you have done, had it been in your control?

Alyssa: I don’t think it was Floriana’s decision to leave that made me reevaluate my feelings towards Sanvers. It was more how the writers were choosing to close the chapter. While Floriana’s decision to leave certainly was heartbreaking, if Supergirl had managed to do justice to their storyline and found a way to maintain the aspect of their relationship that made it such an amazing dynamic last season, then I think things would’ve been as good as they could be. It was going to suck no matter what because one half of an amazing ship wasn’t going to be seen on our televisions on a consistent basis, but I would’ve chosen to do justice to the couple and to the many fans that have found a personal connection with Sanvers. I would’ve found a way to send Maggie away — on good terms — with the option of bringing her back.

Lizzie: I think more than that I just started bracing for the inevitable end and really, really hoped they were not going to kill Maggie off, which I totally understand is a very low bar to set, but that’s where we are these days, still. And they didn’t, which I’m glad, but I honestly …would have gone another way with it. I guess this all depends on issues whose answers we’re not privy to, like possible future availability, and the like, and if there was just no way they were getting Floriana back then a clean break was for the best, and to keep Alex tied up to a character that was just never gonna appear on screen was hardly fair ….I just, I didn’t like the storyline that led up to it, and I didn’t like that we didn’t get to see the conversations about the issue that led to their breakup, but that we picked up with them already broken up. It felt like they avoided the most important part, and I feel like they didn’t treat them as they would any other couple, which is what they always stated they were doing.

Lyra: If I had been in control of how these two would have been separated or how Floriana would have spent less time on the show, I would have put her undercover and I wouldn’t have jumped into the marriage storyline. It pushed them into a place that they weren’t ready for. There’s a reason why I enjoy the slow burn so much and it’s because they learn about each other in a deep and intimate way that can’t be accomplished in a season and some change. That being said, I believe we were at the start of something truly amazing and putting Maggie undercover would have given the actress the flexibility to expand on her career while continuing to build on the relationship that so many have fallen in love with and related to.

Sarah: Going into season three I had to put my guard up on enjoying Sanvers at all because I knew it would be that much harder when they inevitably broke up. My hope for them given Floriana Lima’s exit was that their split would be handled with the respect they deserved. In my opinion that didn’t end up happening, in the slightest. I can’t say how I would have written the story specifically, but I would have let them break up on screen and it would have made sense for both their characters, instead of feeling forced.

Lariel: If I’d been more invested in them as a couple, the news of her leaving might have been painful for me. I don’t recall if the news of her leaving was before or after the S2 finale? But I was hoping they would not kill her off. And they didn’t.

Lacey: I’m going to have to agree with Lizzie and Lariel. While I was happy the couple was there, they weren’t one that I was fully emotionally invested in and when Floriana announced her departure, I knew it was a matter of time when they would break up. I think the issue that surrounded their break-up was a relatable one to many people but I think the way the writers brought it about was out of the blue and felt very rushed. Like Lizzie said, fans didn’t even get to see the initial conversation that led to their break-up and if I was a shipper of that relationship, I’d most definitely feel shortchanged.

Kayla: I’m with Lariel, here. I wasn’t as invested in Sanvers as I was in other parts of the show. Once I knew Floriana was leaving, all could do was hope for a good conclusion to the relationship.

But, in an interview Kreisberg said that they reached out to Floriana and she decided to leave. They had plans to keep the relationship going, obviously. The writers did the best they could in a situation that they didn’t want.

What would I have done if it was me? I would’ve at least had the “I want a baby” conversation on screen. To me, that would’ve helped. It would’ve given better resolution to see the actual break up. It would’ve given proper resolution. That’s where it really fell flat for me, and I can see why the shippers are frustrated with how it was done.

Lori: Her decision to leave didn’t really impact my view of Maggie but it was definitely disheartening. Here was a well-rounded story with 2 well-rounded characters, for the most part, and Floriana put an expiration date on it. During the summer hiatus I remember hoping Sanvers wouldn’t devolve into a “Bury Your Gays” trope and I was hoping that Supergirl wouldn’t ship Maggie off to somewhere else only to have Alex mention her in passing, like what Grey’s Anatomy did with Callie and Arizona. So, with that being said, I liked that they broke up (I mean I don’t like that they broke up, but you know what I mean) the way they did because having kids/not having kids is such a deal breaker in any real life relationship.

Funmbi: I actually didn’t know that Floriana would be leaving until after Season 3 started. It didn’t at all change my feelings for SANVERS, but I’ve been incredibly concerned about how the break-up would come. I was really hoping Maggie wouldn’t end up being killed off, so in that regard, I’m OK with the writers’ story decision. I wonder if just replacing Floriana with another actress was ever considered. Anywho, my priority has been for the relationship to end in such a way that healing and closure would be possible for Alex. Yes, she would hurt for awhile, but I certainly didn’t want the split with Maggie to close off the potential for an HEA. Alex deserves to be happy!

Hillary: I think everyone makes great points about the break up and being invested, and quite honestly the entire thing would have played out fine if they had had that major conversation on screen. I may not have been a full shipper, but I am behind representation that matters. This was a major conversation between characters that LGBTQ young adults need to see because it shows another side in the argument. Sometimes, the couples work out and have kids (remember Callie and Arizona’s reunion?) and in real life many couples break up because of this major life decision. Breaking up Sanvers was the right move given everything, but it sucks that the writers weren’t up to the challenge to give Chyler Leigh and Floriana Lima an opportunity to act out what would have been a powerful scene.

How do you feel about the Floriana Lima in particular, especially considering the latinx controversy and the comments she made equating homophobia to a culture she doesn’t belong to?

Alyssa: Honestly, I lost all respect that I had for her. I understand what Floriana wanted to accomplish with diversity, but this was certainly not the way to go about it. You have to understand that there are fans looking at you, the actors to do well by them. Her comments were disingenuous, and things got bad when she wouldn’t even admit that she did anything wrong. While this didn’t affect me personally, it did affect Lizzie, who does an amazing job at laying everything out as it is. It was the kind of thing that could affect your feelings towards a character because of how deeply rooted the lack of awareness and the insensitivity of it all.

Lizzie: This is a personal issue to me, and I’ve been deeply offended, not just by her insensitive comments, because that can be chalked up to ignorance, but by the way she’s doubled down on the notion that she did nothing wrong, refused to apologize and just dismissed valid concerns with a hand wave and a that’s not what I meant. Do I think she was malicious? No. But, truly, who cares if it’s not what you meant? If you don’t explain what you meant, then how are people to know? The most offensive part, obviously, for me, is that she even dared to speak about a culture she doesn’t belong to because she got a tan and a role as a Mexican – which she is categorically not.

So, yes, this soured me on the actress for good, and it soured me on the character. I lost any and all attachment to Sanvers, and honestly, started counting the days till she was gone. Even skipped her scenes for an episode, because looking at her just made me too angry. And for me, unless I see a real acknowledgment from her or an actual attempt to understand why people are upset, then …well, I’ll let a gif say it:

Lyra: The fact that Floriana wasn’t Latinx and her comments where she acquitted homophobia to a culture that she didn’t belong to, really turned me off the actress. It made it harder for me to connect to her character’s storyline and appreciate Sanvers because the entire time I was thinking, “You are not Latinx. You are not Latinx!” I’ve always had a really big problem with Italian Americans taking roles from people that are clearly Latinx because the people that make an argument for it saying that it’s okay, come from a place of privilege. Latinos are an ethnicity, not a race. We are a vast rainbow of people and it’s insulting to have Italian Americans playing us because they look like the stereotypical Hollywood representation of what we look like and it perpetuates a lie. Also it takes away jobs from actual Latinx people looking for acting positions. You can’t just put on a tan and think that you can play this part or speak for a people. Looking to fill a Latinx role? Hire a Latinx actor.

Sarah: Any respect I had for Floriana quickly evaporated after her comments came out. It got even worse when she refused to admit she said anything wrong or offensive, which was true on both counts. To be honest I don’t think I can say everything wrong about it better than Lizzie because I agree with every word. I myself am not Latinx, so I can’t say it comes from as personal a place as others here but it always hurts to see representation get so screwed up like this.

Lariel: Sigh. Lizzie’s not gonna like this answer. But unfortunately, over the years I have edited news stories about homophobia in Mexican-American communities. So while Lima may not have said it well, I got what she was saying because I’d heard it before from actual Latinx.

Lacey: Everything Lizzie said and more! I don’t know what Lima hoped to gain by her comments but all it did was solidify the disrespect she had for the community she was supposedly representing. While yes she is playing a fictional character on a TV show, her words were HER words and she most definitely crossed a line.

Kayla: You’ve all seen me rant on Floriana. No, I’m not Latinx, but I feel for them with how Floriana handled the topic. She dodged questions about this for months, and when she finally discusses it, she is very insensitive and stereotypical. She shouldn’t have been talking about something she knows nothing about.  Do I know much more? No. But, I have had this explained to me by a Latinx.

However, she should’ve also not tried to bring Latinx representation to a character when she’s not Latinx. It soiled me on her and any attachment I had to Maggie or Sanvers. I feel deeply that representation needs to be done correctly (for any culture or orientation) and Floriana (and the writers), didn’t do that for Maggie.

Lori: It kind of reminded me of when Ginnifer Goodwin made a comment about how Emma and Regina, of Once Upon a Time, can never be in a relationship because OUAT is a family show. Like Goodwin, Floriana made generalization that was in poor taste and I think she was just ill-informed. Any culture itself is not homophobic, but some of the people of that culture may be homophobic.

Funmbi: Representation matters, but even as we try to expand this inclusion, it must be done in meaningful, respectful, and deliberate ways. The idea of adding a Latinx character to Supergirl is a good one; but if Maggie is supposed to be a Mexican-American woman, it seems to me that, at minimum, the actress should be of Latin American descent. I don’t think Floriana necessarily bears the blame for being cast (this is a responsibility for the writers/casting director); however, she’s definitely responsible for her own words. For Floriana (as an outsider) to mischaracterize an entire culture as homophobic was quite disrespectful.

Hillary: I have to second with Lizzie stated. A lot of actors sometimes make comments and generalizations that come to bite them in the butt. I was also going to mention the Goodwin comment (thanks for pointing it out Lori) because I think genre actors often forget that they have a huge platform for representation, no matter what kind. I was frustrated and angry to hear Lima’s sweeping notion that the Latinx community is homophobic. I have been very vocal about how representation matters, and I think everything surround Maggie (Lima and the writers) didn’t do that character justice on any level.

Do you think Sanvers deserved better? Did Maggie? Who’s ultimately responsible for the fate of the ship – the writers, the actress, or is it a shared blame kind of thing?

Alyssa: Sanvers definitely deserved better. While Floriana certainly deserves blame for her fakeness in Maggie’s portrayal, ultimately Sanvers’ fate rests with the writers. They knew that Floriana was leaving. They knew that there was no way to make this not hurt fans of the couple. But the absolute last thing you want to do as writers to fans of one of your most popular ships is do them wrong. There wouldn’t have been injustice in bringing Sanvers relationship to an end, or a pause, if done right. But the writers didn’t really seem to put any effort into it. They found an issue — children — and just pounded the message home. They destroyed the aspect of Sanvers that had been a staple: communication. In season 2, Alex and Maggie knew each other like the back of their hands. Then in season 3, that all seemed to vanished. They became something else; something unrecognizable. They were different. And not for the better.

Lizzie: I think Sanvers did, not so much Maggie. The couple deserved to be treated, in all respects, as they would treat a heterosexual couple, and I don’t know if they always did that. As for the character, she’s very much tied to her performer so even though, yes, Maggie probably deserved more of a background and S2 should have given it, Floriana chose to leave and she’s at least partly responsible for the fact that this story is over. This wasn’t just a writing decision, it was an actor choosing to move on for a role and the writers trying to do the best they could under the circumstances. Does that mean the writers did the best they could have? No. But it’s not all on them, because they probably didn’t plan to be in a position where they’d have to write her out in the first place.

Lyra: Of course I think Sanvers deserved better. Despite Floriana’s fakeness, even her character deserved better. And as for who’s ultimately to blame for the fate of the ship, I blame Floriana. I don’t know what’s happening behind the scenes. I can only make judgements based on what I see, like everybody else in this fandom despite what they claim to know. Floriana decided that a career outside of Supergirl and by the side of her predator boyfriend Casey Affleck, was more important than representation on TV and a proper ending of a storyline for an iconic couple.

Sarah: Sanvers definitely deserved better, a lot more respect and a hell of a better send off than they got. Maggie I wish I could say the same, but my negative feelings toward Floriana I admit are influencing that one. Despite that I wish Maggie wasn’t pushed into the conflict cliched story role so they get let her and Floriana go. I realize the writers didn’t likely have a lot of leeway for Maggie’s exit so they did what they thought was their best (it wasn’t) but at the end of the day Floriana is responsible for Maggie leaving.

Lariel: As has happened to often with relationships in the Arrowverse, I think it’s the fans that deserve better. It feels like we can rarely have nice things, and even when we get them it’s not without struggle. (Olicity, looking at you now.)

Lacey: I think Sanvers deserved better, yes. I don’t think Maggie did and I continue to see hashtags saying “Maggie Deserved Better.” If by that you mean she deserved a different actress playing her, then yes, she did deserve better. I’ve said this before and I’ll continue saying it, Floriana CHOSE to leave the show. Period. No one forced her to. That is not on Sanvers or the writers, that is all on her. But some fans seem to want to blame the writers or even other castmates because they “took up Floriana’s screen time which made her want to leave.” It’s real easy to cast blame on someone else than to stop and take a look at the cold, hard truth and that truth is, Floriana “outgrew” this show in her mind. Fans need to point the finger of blame in the right direction and not blame the writers who, like Lizzie said, did the best they could do with what they had.

Kayla: I’m with Lizzie. Sanvers deserves so much better. Maggie’s character was ruined for me ages ago, though, as well as my investment in the ship. The way it was done was the writers dealing with what was handed to them because an actress didn’t want to do the character anymore. All the blame falls to Floriana for the death of Sanvers.

Could they have tried to flesh Maggie out more? Definitely. Probably would’ve helped me with investment in her character. However, Maggie is the love interest of a supporting character, and they have so many other characters that they didn’t have time to do it.

Lori: No, I don’t think Sanvers deserved better but I do think Maggie did. I get that this is Kara’s show and Maggie is just an ancillary character to a supporting character but the show could’ve done without Winn and his girlfriend in season 2 and fleshed out Maggie’s backstory. Fleshing out her backstory in season 3 even though we all knew that Floriana was leaving kind of felt like too-little, too-late and I blame the writers for that one.

Funmbi: SANVERS totally deserved better. I’ve already mentioned this, but was the idea of replacing Floriana with another (preferably Latinx actress) ever floated? *SIGH* The scenes of Alex and Maggie in their home, going back and forth with each other again and again, unable to move beyond the impasses, were heartbreaking. I don’t know that I think break-up sexy times were a good idea, but I get that maybe the characters needed that closure. Ultimately, Alex and Maggie deserved the opportunity to be their authentic selves and have their stories told with respect. The hope is that, as Alex moves forward, the writers will learn lessons from the SANVERS/Floriana situation.

Hillary: I think Chyler Leigh and the fans deserved better. The relationship and Maggie’s departure made sense with everything that was happening on and off the show, but the Arrowverse has often failed when it comes to positive representation. I also don’t know if the writers or the actresses can be blamed for when ships don’t work out. The writers and the actresses did the best they could with what they were given – but maybe the CW should look at more diverse writers or an actresses who isn’t going out for auditions while they have a steady role on a hit show.

Was the issue that made them break-up a valid issue for a couple to break up? How do you feel the show handled their two different perspectives in this regard?

Alyssa: Oh most definitely. This is the kind of thing that can and should make or break a relationship. But the fact that this wasn’t something that Alex and Maggie had talked about before getting engaged was troublesome. Because Alex and Maggie had always been good at communicating with each other. This issue just sort of arose out of nowhere, and the way it was handled after that certainly didn’t help matters. We saw Alex try to make it work — for what Maggie wanted, even though she couldn’t force her feelings down forever. But Maggie just sort of dismissed her feelings. Maggie made this Alex’s fault. She blamed this issue on Alex. She ultimately blamed their breakup on Alex, which is petty as hell. It compromised Maggie’s character in a way, for me.

Lizzie: Totally. I don’t think this is an issue you can compromise on when both parties are so sure of what they want, and I don’t think either of them is wrong, they just want different things. I did not like, however, how the show made Maggie kinda absolve herself of guilt and put this on Alex, suggesting that she was enough and kinda asking Alex to justify her decision to want kids. That part was wrong, and sad, and kinda like the writers were choosing a side, and they shouldn’t have, not if they wanted to do this storyline justice.

Lyra: Having children is a big and valid issue that couples need to discuss before they take the next step into marriage. And of course it could break them up. Bringing another person into this world is a monumental decision and if you can’t agree on that life commitment then how could you commit your lives to each other in marriage? You can’t. Do I wish they would have given me a couple more hints of Alex wanting children in her life? Yes. But we’ve got to work with what we got and at the end of the day Alex wanted something that her partner didn’t. And at first Alex was willing to compromise, willing to give up something she always wanted. But ultimately she couldn’t compromise and made a tough decision to end her relationship with her first love. As for Maggie, I was okay with her in the beginning and with the fact that she didn’t want kids. That’s her choice and if she doesn’t want kids then no one can force her to have them. That all changed when she tried to brush off what Alex wanted as just a notion or a fanciful dream for the future. She took all the weight off of her shoulders and put the blame on Alex for why they broke up. It was a mutual break up of two people who couldn’t reach a consensus. That’s it.

Sarah: Definitely. The decision to have children is significant, and life changing in a way that can’t be taken back easily. I can understand entirely why the issue would break them up, I just wish it wasn’t an issue that had to come up so quickly. It was better for both of them in the long run, but I didn’t like in the slightest Maggie made it out to be Alex’s fault. Alex has every right to find someone she wants to spend her life with and have children with. So while I’m sad for Sanvers, I’m glad Alex has a chance to find that lady.

Lariel: 100 percent valid. And frankly, it is good that they broke them up over it rather than have them try to move forward with Alex forever hoping she can change Maggie’s mind. I used to be active in some online mom groups, and I remember some really really foolish young women who would ask whether it would be a good idea to “trick” their husbands into fathering a child. Yeah, at least a few of them were trolls BUT… that idea is out there for real as well. You need to be on the same page. If there was a mistake, it was that sudden, stress-induced proposal before they’d worked this out.

Lacey: It was most definitely a valid issue. Like I said in the last roundtable, having children is something that many couples struggle with, myself included. It took me a long time to come to the decision that I was ready to have kids. It was something I always said I wanted but when it actually came time to planning, it scared the shit out of me. Everyone comes to this decision on their own and at their own pace. Neither Alex nor Maggie were wrong in their feelings or convictions. I can’t cast blame on either of these women because they both were hurting and both saw that they were up against an impossible decision. I think the show did a great just of making the issue that tore them apart a relatable one.

Kayla: Definitely a real issue that can end a relationship. Having kids is a lifelong commitment. So is marriage. And the kids conversation should have happened before the very rushed and poorly done proposal. I think they wanted this to look like it was mutual but it made Alex be the bad guy, and that makes me mad. I Iove Alex to death, and for them to do this, when they said that that they didn’t want to show sides. They did anyways. So, for that I’m mad.

Lori: Besides Kara and Alex’s relationship, I think the Sanvers relationship was handled really well. Those are/were the 2 relationships that have grounded the show in reality. So it makes sense Maggie and Alex broke up the way they did. As I mentioned before I liked that having kids/not having kids was a good way for them to break up. It’s an issue that is very much based in reality and given the fact that they got along so well it made sense to have this be the deal breaker for them. To be honest I think Floriana did a spectacular job with this episode versus the Maggie/her father episode – it was still too-little,too-late though. And, as always, Chyler was phenomenal here. When she cries, I cry.

Funmbi: The difference of opinion on wanting to have children is totally a legitimate reason to break up. Sure, we wish Alex and Maggie would have had that discussion before getting engaged, but sometimes that’s how the cookie crumbles. I never think anyone should be pressured into having children when they don’t want to, and there is no shame in it. At the same time, if Alex wants to be a mother, she shouldn’t have to give up that dream. Yes, Alex and Maggie love each other, but I said this last week and I still believe it: it sucks, but sometimes love isn’t enough.

Hillary: I agree that this issue was a totally valid reason, but why didn’t they show the damn conversation? It was a huge missed opportunity. And I have to agree with Lizzie and Kayla that they way that they wrote Maggie’s character made Alex feel guilty and look like the bad guy was just a infuriating. No one should have to feel ashamed for wanting or not wanting kids, and they writers dropped the ball on that situation.

What do you want to see from Alex Danvers going forward?

Alyssa: I want to see Alex Danvers move forward. She found a big part of herself in this relationship with Maggie, and I want her to understand that she wasn’t defined by one person. I want Alex Danvers to be happy, most importantly. I want her to mourn Maggie — grief is important — I want her to lean on her family and friends, I want her to become the mom she yearns to be, I want her to love again, and I want her to keep being the badass she is.

Lizzie: I’d love to get a chance to see her and Kara bond, and mourn, and just feel the things she has to feel. I really don’t want her alone, though, I don’t want her to go back to the Alex that just had her job and Kara. I want Alex to have a full life, and find love again, and be a mom. That’s what she deserves.

Lyra: I’d like to see Alex mourn Maggie and the life that she could have had with this woman. But I also want her to learn from it and move forward. No stagnating and drowning herself in alcohol until she finds another woman to fall in love with. Believe it or not queer people do more than swoon over who they’re going to date next. I’d like Alex to bond with her sister, Hank, and the discover the kind of person she wants to be and is as a lesbian woman.

Sarah: I’d like to get to know Alex better in general. Whether she’s out kicking ass, or spending more time with Kara she’s always a joy to have on screen. Especially though I want to see the effect Maggie leaving has on her, and to let the people who truly love her, Kara in particular be there for her. Alex has an open future in front of her, and I hope to see her embrace it, in every way.

Lariel: I need more of the sister act. I’ve always loved the sibling relationships in the Arrowverse, and Alex and Kara really need each other right now.

Lacey: First, I want her to be the big sister she was in Season 1. We lost that in Season 2 and it put a bad taste in my mouth. Second, I hope that she can see what Kara has been going through these past 6 months with losing Mon-El. I think it speaks volumes that Kara just dropped everything and took Alex home so she could heal and mourn. That’s what I wanted from Alex for Kara so I’m glad to see we’re getting a glimpse of the old Alex.

Kayla: I want her to lean on Kara to mourn…and maybe also help Kara deal with her relationship baggage too…they can bond together about their broken hearts now that they are both experiencing dealing with heartbreak.

I also want sometime down the road, when moving on is feasible for her, I want Alex to have a new girlfriend and FINALLY get to be a mom. Maybe she can adopt as a single mom? She’ll have tons of help from Kara and everyone at the DEO.

Lori: I hope she gets a new girlfriend sooner rather than later, to be honest. If the writers choose to let her and Kara grieve their past relationships together and let that play out over several episodes then I’d be interested in that too. I got my fingers crossed for a new love interest for Maggie by season’s end.

Funmbi: I love that Kara made the executive decision that she and Maggie would be going home. It will be good for both of them to be with their mother. Plus, Kara has been mourning a relationship too. I hope that they can lean on each other. Both of them can take this time, away from work and National City, to heal.

Hillary: Like most, I would love to see Alex and Kara mourn together and get back to that strong sister relationship. Would a new love interest for Alex be great – of course! But I think they need to hash out Alex more as a well-rounded character rather than having her be defined by her sexuality or relationships.

If the writers were able to bring Maggie back – even if just at the end of the show, to give Alex a happy ending of sorts, would you want that? What’s the best-case scenario here?

Alyssa: Honestly, I wouldn’t. I think moving on from this relationship is what’s best for Supergirl here. Sanvers deserved better. Alex Danvers deserves better. It would feel cheap for Supergirl to just bring Maggie back and seemingly ignore everything that ruined this relationship. You can’t wave a magic wand on the situation. That’s not how this works. There was a sense of finality in Maggie’s exit, and now the best thing is to just simply move on.

Lizzie: No, I wouldn’t. I think Maggie was important for Alex, and I know the character was important to so many people, but I think their story is closed and unless one of them is at some point reconsidering their decision on the kids issue – which would be very cliche – then there’s no going back. It’s time to move forward.

Lyra: No. I don’t want that. Alex deserves better than growing and changing for seasons to just have Maggie come back at the end and give us a happy Sanvers ending. No Felicia. Maggie’s gone. Period. Let’s keep the train moving. Alex will fall in love again. Denying that fact would be denying us proper representation on TV. LGBT people go through relationships just like everyone else and we fall in love or break out of it just like everyone else.

Sarah: To be blunt, hell no. Alex deserves a happy ending with someone she chose to be with, through the good and bad, and embracing everything she wants and needs in a relationship. If they had to bring Maggie back I’d only want it as an acknowledgement and nod to the past but to leave it there in the past.

Lariel: I think I’d only want to see Maggie return to acknowledge for both of them that life goes on, they’ve moved on to new phases/other people. I don’t think I want to see Maggie change her mind here. I think the best case scenario is that they are able to kick ass together and be friends again.

Lacey: Um, no thanks. I want Alex to live her own story. She came out last season and immediately got into a relationship. I want to see her find her own way as a gay woman and discover what she truly wants and needs. I think her standing up for herself and saying she wants to raise a child was a huge step for her and I want her to continue to do that.

Kayla: No, I don’t want Maggie to return. Let Alex find a woman she can raise a child with and love fully. The way it was written shows that the writers have shut the door on Sanvers. It needs to stay there because Maggie is never going to bring Alex the happiness she deserves. The child issue will always be an issue. Because Maggie is a character who makes up her mind and sticks to it. This is a topic she won’t reconsider.

Lori: I actually like how they ended things. There will always be love there and Maggie even wished the best for Alex by saying she’d be a great mother. Like, this was a best case scenario break-up. Worst case scenario break up would’ve had Maggie do something super shitty to Alex and that would’ve been such a cliche way to write off a character. I wouldn’t mind of Maggie made a reappearance – maybe she reconsiders being a mother? – but I’m happy if this is the last time we see her.

Funmbi: I don’t think that would be a good idea. I mean, I guess Maggie could change her mind out children, but that wouldn’t feel very genuine to me. SANVERS is done. Let Alex mourn, heal, and move on, either as a single mother or with another woman she’s fallen in love with and chosen to start a family with too. If we see Maggie later on, let her meet Alex as a friend. I want Maggie to have resolved her relationship with her parents, whether that means her parents evolve beyond their homophobia, or Maggie closes the door to that relationship and heals.

Hillary: Maggie was a big first for Alex in so many ways, and while we always remember those who impacted our lives in that way we don’t necessarily want them in our lives. I’m with Lizzie on this – it’s time to move forward.

Supergirl airs Mondays at 8/7c on The CW.

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