Book Review: Gork the Teenage Dragon by Gabe Hudson

I’m not going to come in here saying this was a great book that I enjoyed, because that’s not what we do here. Instead, we’re going to stay honest in this book review, and everyone is going to deal with me griping about how terrible this was. But first, a synopsis!

Gork is a teenage dragon (shocking, I know), who is on his Queen Quest. He’s dealing with weak dragon problems, like a too big heart, a controlling and disappointed grandfather, and tiny horns. Gork is trying to make Runcita his queen, and that is a whole dang situation. As Gabe Hudson (and by extension, Gork) constantly state, Runcita is luscious. She’s super powerful and dangerous and of course, that’s what Gork wants.

But nothing can go right, let me tell you. Gork has to deal with everything possible getting in his way as he tries to offer his crown to Runcita. His missing grandfather keeps butting in by giving Gork’s friend better horns than him, shrinking Gork’s heart, and royally messing him up. I don’t want to spoil it, but it’s an ever present issue.

Now, let’s talk about why this book is actually the worst.

First off, it’s so dang repetitive. I went through the first chapter, and the words “and I thought (/was thinking)” are used eight times. For a chapter that is only seven pages long, that is too many times. Heck, later in the book there is a page that is just “thwack thwack thwack” for a whole dang page. To tell us that Gork was flying a lot. There was another point where I thought I was rereading a sentence, because they started the same way. Its just too much.

Also, the way Runcita is described made me want to vomit. She is constantly called luscious, Gork is described as drooling over her (specifically her scent), and he even sends a drone into her room to put a tracking number on her. Disgusting. My worry with this is that young dudes will read this book and think it’s okay to talk to and treat women that way. I know that’s an extreme reaction, but honestly, we deserve better.

I feel personally attacked by both Goodreads for recommending this book to me, and by the book itself. Reading this was a terrible way to finish the first month of the year. I really did like the idea; a teen dragon who isn’t popular, trying to exist. I’m here for that book, but I need someone else to write it.

If you’d like to hear about my most recommended books for you to read in 2020, you can check that out here! If you’re foolish enough to mess around with Gork, you can do that here.

Which is a book that you’ve recently read that was a bad time?

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