We’d like to say we were exaggerating when it comes to the star-studded Netflix flick Red Notice. But we’re not. This movie was so dry and so boring that it would’ve been better to take a nap for the hour and 55 minutes that this movie stole from us aka something we’ll never get back.
Sure, it was nice seeing Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Ryan Reynolds, and Gal Gadot in a movie. They are a talented bunch of individuals with mega-hits under their belts with a strong individual fanbase that follows them wherever they go. Plus they all looked hot, and the bisexual in us appreciated that.
But that’s where it all stopped for Red Notice.
First up, the characters. There was nothing new there. Johnson played the same character that he played in Hobbs & Shaw; a tough and brooding muscled man who saves the world. Reynolds played the same character he does in every single movie he’s ever made; loveable goofball, with a witty one-liner to match. In fact, I wondered if I was watching Hobbs & Shaw for a second because they both appeared in that together.
Then there was Gal Gadot. Personal issues aside, because the internet is ripe with them, she just didn’t stand out. And that’s unfortunate for someone who made us ugly cry in Wonder Woman when she told Chris Pine‘s character how it was before crossing No Man’s Land. She tried, God knows she did. But Gadot‘s character and its arc were flatter than a watered-down pancake and that’s pretty flat if we do say so ourselves.
Then there was the story. We could tell that they were trying to go for fun and light. And it had the makings of it. But the cheesy elements of it all combined with the flat characters, that were brought to life by extraordinary talent, left Red Notice struggling from the very start. Plus there was no connection. They tried. But we didn’t connect with the story, the characters, and their backgrounds.
And all that’s left us is sad. Red Notice had the potential. It had the international platform that should’ve made it a hit. But it faltered over its own grandiose star power and its pompous attitude that reeked of, “Well, we have these popular people on a huge platform, what else do we need?” Substance. That’s what you need. And unfortunately, Red Notice had none of that.
Red Notice is available on Netflix.
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