Foundation 2×08 features an execution that turns into an explosive rescue mission, Hari Seldon’s left hand (which is also Hari Seldon), a cautionary tale about robots…and messy space hookups. While all of that is going on, Empire decides to take a little trip to Terminus, and Tellem keeps doing her evil cult leader thing. Watching “The Last Empress” is like following at least three different shows at once, complete with genius moves by Salvor Hardin that explain the past, which is sort of also the future, using the present.
An episode that’s so packed with a combination of plot and post-coital chatter gone wrong really shouldn’t work—like, at all—but it does. So, this is us, once again, putting all the greedy corporate folks on notice: Y’all can’t create bots that will produce this mess and still make it a good mess. And even if you did, they might wind up rising up against you and eliminating every single one of you they can’t control. Might be a good time (or, actually, y’all are way late here) to make a deal with the writers’ and actors’ unions, is what we’re saying here.
Now that we’ve said that, we present to you…whatever happened to our brains while we were watching Foundation 2×08.
Thoughts on Foundation 2×08
- “Oh, I always keep an eye on anything that interests me.” You can tell Dusk is old AF because he thinks referring to a whole-ass human woman as a thing is ok. And then, he’s like…caressing her neck from behind while he basically has her trapped there like that? It’s a no from me.
- “She will always be here, as she always has been.” Really love how Terrence Mann plays the just completely…well, robotic, actually…way Dusk says this. And his distress as continues to say it whenever he tries (fails) to access his memories.
- “You’re as programmed as Demerzel is.” Ok but that’s creepy AF?
- “I’m sorry, Gaal” sounds very “sorry, not sorry” here. Basically, I loathe Tellem, but also…this is fun to watch? Like, if you’re going to be evil, do it like this. Go all in, as it were.
- If you didn’t just feel Brother Constant and Poly Verisof’s fear during that almost execution, do you have feelings at all? Isabella Laughland and Kulvinder Ghir killed it.
- I continue to not understand why Day’s armor is so totally useless around the arms and even shows all that neck, while Dawn is buttoned up (so to speak). Not mad about it, just still do not understand.
- The prayers…such beautiful writing. (Pay your writers!)
- “Fuck, I knew it was him. Before I even saw his fucking face, I knew it was him.” Bel is me, and I am Bel.
- If I say what I’m really thinking about the way Demerzel is draped over Empire’s back like that…
- All that chaos, the trying to find people through the smoke…the execution is awesome. Especially since, although we get the impression people are having trouble finding each other, we can still see the fighting.
- Justice for Beki, while we’re at it.
- “…well, just know how grateful I am to you.” “What, for killing you?” Yes, we do continue to be giant Hober Mallow stans in this house.
- “You talk about safety when our palace is still on fire.” Me at all this “mild” and “have the tools” bullshittery.
- Absolutely losing my mind over the way Queen Sareth purposely bumps into Demerzel, just because she can.
- …and just after everyone almost died, and there was all this political arguing about the Hari of it all, we’re now just hooking up. As one does with
- “Vengeful plots don’t often have romance in them.” Enjoiner Rue is obviously reading all the wrong books and watching all the wrong shows. Sad, actually.
- Ok. And now, we’re just…”no, you’re in love with Empire!!!!!” like a couple of children or whatever.
- No, seriously. What even? “You’re fucking him. Or you’re about to be.” “You’re already fucking Dusk.” “You love him.” “You love Dusk!” They both just barely survived an attack, and…this. Cinema!
- “I don’t speak numbers.” “Neither do I.” And this, kids, is why you should pay attention in math class. You never know when you’ll need it!
- “Kept in the dark. A left hand, blissfully unaware of what the right hand is doing. Fuck. I’m the left hand.” When you work at a volunteer-led nonprofit…
- I would enjoy to get to yell at God the way Brother Constant’s dad gets to yell at Hari.
- “I would’ve imagined it to be uncomfortable, being stared at by Empire.” “I’ve met Hari Seldon. I’m used to fame.” To translate, Poly said, “I don’t care that you tried to kill me. You ain’t shit compared to bigger celebrities.” Better luck next time, Day! Try wearing less clothing next time, and maybe you’ll be more intimidating.
- “How all the children love his rigor.” I…he’s so smug AF…and I…I don’t think he’s talking about mathematical rigor here??? Empire, chill. Not everything is a chance for innuendo.
- “Ah, watch the rigor melt like candy.” Me, when I couldn’t quite get the proof as elegant as I wanted to in grad school and decided to just bullshit.
- “If the left hand doesn’t get to put its thumb on the scale, what’s the point in having a thumb?” I mean, opposable thumbs are useful in other ways but ok, Doctor.
- It’s giving wibbly-wobbly; it’s giving timey-wimey…we’ve got the Foundation calling for Hober Mallow.
- “And by seizing you mean…” “Sex.” Carpe Hober. So true.
- “I couldn’t decide between kissing first or disrobing first. But disrobing first seemed more efficient.” Ok but is there something about spending time on Trantor and being into disrobing or.
- …this is why we put our pants back on when we get out of bed. Don’t be like Empire, Hober! Don’t get caught in life and death situations while your ass is naked! (I mean, I do appreciate the spotlight, though.)
- I think we’re up to two messy space hookups and one messy space sex now, no?
- “Some believe that with age comes inferiority, but there are advantages to a lifetime of experience amassed.”
- And now, we have Sareth and Dawn getting theirs while the grownups (Dusk and Rue, this time, since they’ve already done their doing) are off getting answers…
- Gaal, the way to get Tellem to stop with the evil monologuing is to pull a Buffy. Tell her you get it. She’s evil. And ask her if you have to chat about it all day.
- Just saying. Dusk and Tellem say totally opposite things, kind of, about aging. But both the Cleons and her are doing some evil, shady things to cheat death.
- And here, we learn that the person with the real power is not a person at all, and something about OG Cleon and prison…
- All these people getting naked, and by the end, Day is probably the most covered up he’s been all season. So weird. Is that new armor? With, essentially, a turtleneck? Kinda ominous…
- …especially with the whole “evil robot stare as the last image until next episode” aspect.
How are you feeling after Foundation 2×08? Leave us a comment!