So, we have not exactly been subtle about being a giant NO on not only the drive behind Suits: LA existing but also the dude who was cast as the lead. The latest casting news, that Josh McDermitt from The Walking Dead will play opposite that one guy who couldn’t even support his own union…much less avoid doing a racism, actually gives us hope. Because, see: We can turn this whole thing around. Forget Suits: LA. We would like to submit to The Powers That Be a much more worthy spinoff. Let’s call it Suits: Mullets.
To be clear, we’re not even going to sit here and claim that this is at all a serious suggestion. But, at the same time, thinking Amell is at all going to measure up to…pretty much anyone who was on the original Suits is about as unserious as it gets so. Our spinoff idea remains superior. If you don’t like that, feel free to take it up with one of our (many) lawyers: Pearson, Specter, Litt, Zane, Wheeler, Williams, and Bennett are all probably free these days. Oh, and Ross! Of course. Ross is, technically, no longer a fraud. Unlike some people.
Actually, even Harold Gunderson could win this case for us. So. There’s that!
Tired: Suits spinoff in LA. Wired: Mullets in LA.
Instead of the main character mocking McDermitt’s Stuart Lane for having a skinny tie, a la Harvey always dunking on Mike, Black can offer commentary on Lane’s too-business mullet. (Think lacking in the “party in the back” department.) It’ll be an instant hit. In fact, why don’t we all do the most productive thing possible and take the good — if, occasionally, full of BS — Suits name out of it and just call the series Mullets: LA. Talk about ratings gold.
Think outside the box, TV people. We know you can do it. Who needs entertainment law, when you can have a law firm that is dedicated to providing legal counsel for arrogant dudes with gloriously tragic looks? Battles over who gets their name on the wall? Oh, please! Those are tired. Let’s, instead, create drama over who gets to style their name into the long part of the name partners’ hair. And really, who even cares about a pre-trial can opener ritual, when everyone knows a pre-trial mullet trimming to get that business in the front is where it’s at. Other options: Pre-trial bashing in the face with a toaster. Or, better yet, just…don’t do it at all.
Thank you to Josh McDermitt, his character Eugene Porter, and their utterly iconic hair from TWD for this inspiration. So, who’s with us? Thoughts on replacing Suits: LA with Suits: Mullets and/or Mullets: LA? Hit us with those comments!
