I’ll say it time and time again – Monet and Luna are pure evil and at this point, I see no redemption in them. The way that they manipulate people and hurt people for their own gain, while taking no responsibility for themselves is disgusting.
Here’s the thing with Gossip Girl, this goes hard. Like they are like here’s the worst thing that can happen and let’s mix it in with the best things and someone will suffer. And as if poor Zoya hasn’t been through enough since moving to New York City, she’s got to survive her birthday.
I am not a fan of birthdays, but if I was Zoya, I would flat out not celebrate either. Her Mom died giving birth to her and she doesn’t feel right celebrating on her birthday. She doesn’t even want to acknowledge it. She wants to just fade during the day and they can celebrate her birthday the day after.

But this is Gossip Girl and we left off last episode knowing that Luna and Monet were ready to go to war.
And the first shot fired is telling Gossip Girl that it is Zoya’s birthday. She’s convinced that it is Julien and she’s pretty sure that she’s setting out to ruin her day. Which hey, I interpret as her thinking that Julien blames her for her Mom’s death. And for a 15 year old this is all too much to carry.
Julien is thinking about their Mom and has decided that she’s no longer going to be filtered. This is going to set the Pure Evil Sisters off. They are so worried about being hangers on and achieving their worth through making someone an influencer. And when Julien gets to school, they show just how displeased they are with this situation.
But Julien isn’t worried about that. She’s entranced by the food trucks that Obie brought in for Zoya’s birthday and wants to go get a crepe. Mad respect cause crepes are never a bad idea.

She’s having a morning, cause at home she had to deal with the Dad’s new girlfriend, who is OVERLY eager to impress her. Her Dad is asking her if she’s okay, telling her that he’s thinking of her. She comes to school and there is her ex doing stuff for her sister that he didn’t do for her.
Zoya arrives at school and Obie is excited to celebrate her. And I do believe that Zoya is thankful, but it makes her feel awkward. And so when she tells Obie that she doesn’t celebrate her birthday because it’s the day her Mom died.
I really do feel for both Zoya and JC because they’ve been through a lot and every time they want to be close, something stands in their way. Even when JC tries to be kind, she isn’t accepted by Zoya, because she believes the worst of her sister. She’s let Luna and Monet – they both have – get in the way and destroy the belief that they have in each other.
I admire Obie for trying to be there for her, to show her love and acceptance in a way that no one else does. But I also thin that he’s used to a certain type of girl who wants his money and all the expensive things, when all she wants is dinner at home and time to get to know the real him.
When he offers to cook for her, she calls her Dad and finds out that they may be evicted. She’s even more sure that it’s her sister. It doesn’t help when Evil Luna approaches her in the hallway and tells her that JC did something, but they had no clue that she would use it. Umm she didn’t. You did Luna.
And as they see Obie and Zoya talking, they do the next thing in their war. They send Gossip Girl a tip that Zoya may be evicted, setting it up making sure that JC believes that Zoya is filling the next shot and JC needs to get rid of her.
Now, my sister and I may not always get along, but taking her to war. I am good. Kate has become obsessed with Gossip Girl and says that she has an entry she needs to write for possible publication. Jordan and Wendy decide to take Gossip Girl away from her until she finishes. And I think that these two have just as much fun with everything as Kate does.

Probably my favorite thing about this school day is that Zoya meets Milo Sparks. Georgina Sparks was one of my favorite characters from the original so introducing her son and him being willing to take on helping Zoya – I love it. He’s just as shifty as his Mom was and I am here for it. He’s definitely the battle planner for World War Z.
Here’s the thing about going to war – when you do, someone has the job of brokering a treaty. JC has planned a party, Zoya wants one, and someone has told their Dads that they are fighting. My money is on Obie.
Seeing their Dads come together to be there for them, but also lay down the law so that JC and Zoya have to stop their line of bullshit – I love. We both know it won’t get better, especially when their Dad says that they need to throw a joint party. They’re attacking each other, JC went nuclear when Zoya almost got her cancelled, and their Dads are stepping up. But the treaty that they are brokering is forced and that means that Zoya and JC blame each other, so it’s an all out war.
But what I don’t get is how Julien feels the need to use the second worst day of her sisters life to humiliate her. This party is happening. Sure. But taking the moment that your sister got kicked out of school for vandalizing the school and broadcasting it. Shitty move. Airing the version where your sister has a panic attack cause she was being bullied. Shitty AF.
But stopping it and making sure to tell the world that she’s a bully and that she didn’t know what happened – I am glad that Julien did. Do I think that her being a bully is going to stop right away? No. I don’t. But I also think that she’s going to try to be better, because if there is one thing that she got from the day is that she loves her sister.

Zoya and her talk and have a heart to heart. Zoya and Julien aren’t perfect. But they both lost their marbles this night – influenced by others. But at the end of the day, their bond of being sisters is stronger.
Julien helps her apologizing to Obie. He’s frustrated and doesn’t recognize the girl that he’s liked. Zoya explains herself and Obie forgives her.
I hate that I am about to say that I think Zobie is going to have its issues and that it will fizzle, but it will find its way back. And I am okay with that, because I love angst and a slow burn.
What I am hoping happens is that someone takes Monet and Luna down.
AUDREY AND AKI
Aki may not be my favorite person, but he’s growing on me. I am glad that it wasn’t another episode where we had to watch him and Audrey have sex. It’s good to have an episode where we get to know them.
They both feel awkward over what happened with Max. Audrey wants to know if he’s bi or gay and Aki wants to know if she’s cheated before. But the one thing that they don’t want to do is talk to each other.
It takes Audrey trying to make him jealous for her to realize that she’s never asked him about his sexuality. And when she does, there is a fear in Aki’s eyes about what will be thought of him. There is a pain that we can’t understand, but one that looks as though he wants to figure out who he is and doesn’t like being put on the spot.
Aki and her talk and he tells her he thinks he’s bi. She’s supportive and honestly, I can’t wait to watch Aki find himself. It has the possibility to be one of the strongest story lines in the show and I hope they give it the justice and care it deserves.

OTHER THOUGHTS
- I am glad that JC and Zoya have ended the war and I can’t wait to see them unfold as sisters.
- Kate needs Instagram rehab.
- Milo may be my new favorite character and I will not object to more Milo.
- Obie telling Zoya his truth, I get. I get that he doesn’t like who she’s behaving like. But I do wish that these two wouldn’t have argued.
- Kate needs to give up the Gossip Girl reigns a bit.
- I’m so grossed out by Max and a teacher hooking up, I don’t even want to address it. I feel like these storylines are careless and that they make kids think this type of shit is okay, when its not.
- I would be just as mad as Julien if everyone thought that I was trying to destroy my sister and get her evicted.
- I don’t like how Kate lets Zoya think she’s safe and can trust her, when she turns her back on her all the time. She’s using her.
- Zoya and JC spending time together at the end is everything.
- Zoya and JC’s Dad getting along – I am glad. These two need to have a good relationship for their kids.
- Julien trying to beat her sister by using their Moms death is gross.
- Not sure if I like Davis’s GF yet.
Gossip Girl streams on HBO Max.